Quick Summary

• Battered Woman Syndrome (BWS) is the psychological impact of repeated domestic abuse, causing emotional distress, PTSD-like symptoms, and behavioral changes such as withdrawal, self-blame, and hiding abuse.
• The syndrome follows a cycle of abuse—tension, acute battering, and honeymoon phases—that can make leaving an abusive relationship feel impossible and foster learned helplessness.
• Recovery involves creating a safety plan, accessing professional therapy (e.g., trauma-focused CBT, EMDR), building a supportive network, and practicing self-care. 

Research shows an estimated 30% of women worldwide have or will experience physical and/or sexual violence by an intimate partner. Domestic abuse leaves more than physical harm and scars. It has long-lasting emotional and psychological effects that stay with you, often for years after the violence ends. 

Battered woman syndrome (BWS), also known as abused woman syndrome, explains how repeated abuse impacts mental health, your sense of safety, and the ability to heal from trauma. Symptoms can overlap with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and can be difficult to manage alone. 

If you or a woman you love has been in an abusive relationship, understanding what battered woman syndrome is crucial. It’s important to know how to recognize symptoms and how to escape the cycle of abuse. This can be a lonely and frightening time, but with support and the right tools, you can start on a path to healing. 

Below, we’re exploring what battered woman syndrome looks like and how you can overcome it. Read on to learn more. 

What is Battered Woman Syndrome?

The term battered woman syndrome is what mental health professionals use to describe the psychological response to living in an environment of repeated violence. It was coined in the late 1970s by psychologist Lenore E. Walker, who is known for her work in women’s psychology and domestic violence. Today, even though it’s not a formal diagnosis in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5), the phrase is still used in the fields of psychology, therapy, and law. Walker’s research even led to the “cycle theory” of abuse, which explains learned helplessness—the feeling that you’re incapable of escaping an environment, regardless of how bad the physical, emotional, or verbal abuse becomes.

Women with battered woman syndrome often experience PTSD, a diagnosable condition caused by chronic abuse and trauma. This form of PTSD in women who’ve dealt with domestic violence can cause things like flashbacks, anxiety, hypervigilance, and a lack of trust due to ongoing abuse. 

Although abused woman syndrome primarily applies to women who face repeated domestic violence, anyone dealing with prolonged abuse of any form can experience similar psychological effects.

Signs & Symptoms of Battered Woman Syndrome

While there are numerous signs and symptoms of battered woman syndrome, some are more common than others. If you’re in an abusive relationship, you might recognize the following behaviors or feelings. It’s important to know that being in an unsafe relationship doesn’t make you weak or broken. You’re doing the best you can, and help is always available. 

Emotional and psychological symptoms

Research shows that women with battered woman syndrome are more likely to have mental health difficulties, including phobias, anxiety disorders, substance use disorders, depression, and dysthymia (low-grade depression). It can make you feel like you’re living in a constant state of fear, confusion, and self-doubt. 

Other emotional and psychological symptoms of abuse might include:

• Feeling worthless and/or hopeless
• Being constantly anxious
• Believing you deserve it
• Feeling like it’s your fault
• Finding it hard to trust others or have close bonds
• Avoiding other people, places, or activities (even those you once enjoyed)
• Becoming numb or feeling disconnected from your emotions
• Feeling like your life is “happening” to someone else

Symptoms that overlap or mirror PTSD:

• Having flashbacks or nightmares
• Experiencing hypervigilance that makes you constantly look for danger
• Being unable to relax, even when you’re in a safe place
• Having difficulty sleeping
• Finding it difficult to concentrate
• Having mood swings 
• Being irritable
• Experiencing sudden or uncontrollable outbursts

Behavioral symptoms

Behavioral symptoms are also common in people who’ve been abused. You might notice you change how you act in an attempt to keep your environment peaceful. It’s also normal to lie about injuries related to your abuse. You may find yourself making excuses for your partner’s behavior or anger. Or, you might start withdrawing from those around you, either to hide the abuse or because your abuser demands you do so. 

Other behavioral symptoms of abuse might include:

• Hiding or downplaying the abuse
• Changing your appearance or routines so you don’t upset your abuser
• Using clothing to hide bruises or signs of violence
• Refusing to participate in hobbies or work, or social events
• Isolating from loved ones 
• Cutting yourself off from social circles 
• Feeling trapped
• Believing that if you try to leave, things will get much worse
  

“Friends, family, and coworkers can notice signs like withdrawal, anxiety, or sudden changes in behavior without directly confronting the person. Instead, they should offer quiet, consistent support and share resources discreetly to avoid putting the individual at greater risk.”

– Talkspace therapist Cynthia Catchings, PhD, LCSW-S

Escaping and Healing From the Cycle of Abuse

It takes great courage to end an abusive relationship. Sometimes, you might not even be able to think about the idea of it. That doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong. The cycle of abuse keeps you feeling trapped and weak. Understanding this is the first step toward regaining control. 

Understand the cycle

Battered woman syndrome follows a cycle of repetitive stages. It keeps you confused and emotionally dependent on your partner. It’s common to truly believe that the worst is over and better days are ahead, even if the abuse has been ongoing for months or years. 

For many women, the cycle of abuse can look something like this:

1. Tension builds: It’s often over everyday issues, and tension continues to rise in your relationship. During this phase, you might try changing your behavior to avoid upsetting your abuser. 
2. Acute battering occurs: A physical or emotional attack makes you feel powerless and afraid. You sense or know you’re in danger. 
3. The honeymoon phase: Once the episode of abuse ends, your abuser profusely apologizes, promises to change, offers gifts and affection, and tries desperately to convince you that things will be different moving forward. 

From here, the cycle eventually repeats, even if it’s not right away. 

Create a safety plan

No matter what the abuse is, you don’t have to go through this alone. Planning your escape can be terrifying, especially when there are threats of violence, financial control, or isolation. Creating a safety plan helps you gain autonomy and a sense of agency, though. For immediate help, you can contact domestic violence hotlines and other support organizations. 

To create a solid safety plan, you should:

• Identify friends, family, or coworkers you trust
• Have an emergency bag with essentials ready to go (i.e. important documents, money, medication, and clothes)
• Memorize important phone numbers
• Know contact information for support hotlines
• Plan a safe time to leave
• Think of a place (or places) you can go and be protected
• Know your abuser’s schedule, so you can leave when they’re not home
• Decide when you’ll leave and where you’ll go ahead of time 

Get professional help

Wherever you are in your journey, getting professional help can be a step toward healing and finding safety. Studies show that therapy is a transformative resource that helps reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety in women who’ve been abused. It can be even more effective if you work with someone experienced in trauma and abuse. 

Several therapy techniques can offer benefits and hope, including types of therapy for PTSD and trauma. Therapy can help you process your trauma, regain control, escape your situation, and reduce vulnerability in future relationships. 

Therapeutic approaches such as trauma-focused CBT and EMDR are especially effective for Battered Woman Syndrome, as they help survivors process trauma, reduce symptoms, and rebuild a sense of safety and empowerment.”

– Talkspace therapist Cynthia Catchings, PhD, LCSW-S

Forms of therapy known to help women in abusive relationships:

• Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT)
• Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR)
• Present-centered therapies, like helping to overcome PTSD through empowerment (HOPE)
• Prolonged exposure therapy (PE)
• Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT)

Build a support system

Isolation is something many women in abusive relationships experience. It’s also one of the most challenging things to overcome, particularly for those who’ve resorted to hiding their abuse. 

It can be scary to trust others, but building a support system is critical. Knowing you can rely on people helps you reconnect with yourself and build a sense of community. 

To create a solid support system, you can turn to:

• Trusted family 
• Friends or coworkers who listen without judging
• Your therapist
• Support groups for survivors
• Online or digital platforms that ensure help is accessible and anonymous
• Advocacy groups
• Housing services
• National Domestic Violence Hotline
• Online survivor communities like the Safety Net Project

Practice self-care

Self-care is integral to your recovery. It becomes even more essential when you first leave an abusive relationship. Caring for your mind and body can be overwhelming, but even small steps, such as eating well, resting, walking, or journaling, can make a significant difference. 

Effective practices to add to your daily self-care routine include:

• Deep breathing
• Getting into nature
• Reconnecting with an old friend
• Light exercise
• Setting small, achievable goals each day, like showering or eating three healthy meals 
• Creating a calm space to relax, read, or meditate
• Seeking therapy
• Being self-compassionate
• Challenging negative thinking or self-talk

“In the early stages of leaving an abusive relationship, grounding practices like journaling, mindfulness, and connecting with trusted support systems are vital for stability and healing”

– Talkspace therapist Cynthia Catchings, PhD, LCSW-S

Seek resources for survivors

The right resources are key to your recovery. They help you make a safety plan and navigate legal resources. Many also offer assistance if you need financial support or to find a trauma-informed therapist.

Resources for survivors of abuse include:

• The National Domestic Violence Hotline—800-799-SAFE (7233)
• Women’s shelters, battered women’s shelters, and crisis centers for emergency housing, legal support, and counseling
• Legal aid organizations for restraining orders or court advocacy
• Online directories for local support groups for survivors of domestic violence
• Local courts
• Legal aid agencies
• Mental health centers in your area

Finding Support and Healing After Abuse

Realizing you have battered woman syndrome is your first step toward healing from an abusive relationship. Knowledge is powerful, and the more you understand about your experience and how the cycle of abuse works, the better equipped you’ll be to advocate for yourself. In therapy, you will learn to set boundaries and find a path to safety. 

Whether you’re taking the first or the next step toward getting out of an abusive situation, Talkspace offers an accessible way to connect with an experienced therapist who’s qualified to help. You deserve to feel safe, supported, and secure. We can help you with affordable online therapy and emotional support. Contact Talkspace today to get started.

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Although it can be hard to fathom, parental abuse by adult children is real, and it’s something that must be addressed immediately. Children can become abusive toward their parents in multiple ways, including emotional, financial, verbal, or physical abuse. Yet, parental abuse often gets overlooked. Whether it’s due to stigma, feeling guilty, or worrying about societal expectations, many parents struggle to admit when they’re being abused. They might fear judgment, blame, or further alienation, yet recognizing this behavior is important. 

Learning to recognize the signs and knowing how to take action is crucial in reclaiming safety and dignity when a parent is being abused by an adult child. Read on to learn more about what to do when abusive adult children harm their parents. This behavior highlights the crucial need for awareness and proactive measures to deal with the relationship dynamics involved.

Parental abuse by adult children can manifest in many ways. Understanding the signs of different types of abuse is the first, and most important, step.

Recognizing the Signs of Abusive Behavior

Abuse can take many forms, and not all abuse is the same. While some types of abusive behavior are more visible, others can be subtle and harder to detect. Understanding the different ways abuse manifests is essential in recognizing harmful patterns and addressing them effectively. Below, we outline the key types of abuse that adult children may inflict on their parents, along with examples to help identify them.

Emotional abuse

Emotional abuse uses verbal or psychological tactics to manipulate, belittle, or control someone. This type of abuse can leave permanent mental health scars and destroy self-esteem. 

When adult children are emotionally abusive to their parents, this disrespectful behavior  can look like:

• Blaming or criticizing the parent for the child’s struggles
• Using guilt to manipulate
• Yelling, name-calling, or using degrading language
• Ignoring or isolating 
• Threatening to abandon or cut off contact to manipulate a situation 
• Gaslighting — denying events or distorting the truth as a way to confuse and manipulate

Financial abuse

Financial abuse is rarely discussed, yet it can be just as harmful as other forms of abuse, eroding respect and neglecting the responsibility owed to one’s parents. When an adult child is financially abusive, they’ll use their parents’ financial resources for personal needs and gain. This form of abuse can leave parents in severe financial distress, and they often don’t know it’s happening until it’s too late.

Financial abuse by adult children can look like:

• Taking money without consent
• Pressuring parents for financial support
• Using a parent’s name without permission to cosign on a loan or acquire new debt
• Mismanaging money or stealing from accounts
• Demanding or taking inheritance advances
• Exploiting financial power of attorney (POA) for personal gain

Physical abuse

Physical abuse, when inflicted by adult children, is one of the most harmful forms of mistreatment, involving deliberate physical harm or intimidation through violent actions. Beyond causing physical injuries, this abuse can leave parents feeling unsafe in their own homes, creating an environment of fear and vulnerability.

Examples of physical abuse from adult children toward their parents may include:

• Hitting, slapping, shoving, or pushing, causing physical pain or harm
• Using threats of physical violence to intimidate and control
• Destroying property or personal items as a means of asserting dominance

Safety should always be a priority for parents experiencing this type of abuse. Recognizing these behaviors and seeking help—whether through trusted friends, family members, or professional support—is essential in creating a secure and supportive environment.

Neglect

When adult children neglect their parents, they fail to provide essential care and assistance. For ill or aging parents who rely on their children for help, neglect can be both physically and emotionally damaging.

Instances of adult children neglecting their parents can manifest as:

• Refusing to help with essential needs
• Withholding meals, transportation, or help with basic hygiene
• Ignoring medical concerns
• Not taking parents to healthcare appointments
• Leaving parents isolated for extended periods with no communication

“Abusive relationships can profoundly affect mental health. Parents in these situations experience many emotional struggles, including guilt, shame, and a sense of failure. They may blame themselves for this behavior, which can lead to them experiencing anxiety, depression, and diminished self-esteem.”

– Talkspace therapist Famous Erwin, LMHC, MA

Understanding the Dynamics

There’s never an excuse for abusive behavior but understanding where it stems from is the first step in addressing it. 

Abusive adult children can be influenced by several factors, including:

• Unresolved conflict in the family: Past dysfunctional family dynamics can create unhealthy patterns of disrespectful behavior, resentment, or anger that children might replay in their adult lives.
• Mental health issues: Untreated mental health conditions can cause some adult children to act abusively toward their parents and others.
• Substance abuse: Research shows that addiction is linked to an increased risk of violence and can spark aggression and manipulative behavior that can be abusive.

For elderly parents forced to rely on their children, such abuse from a grown child can leave them feeling trapped. There are many reasons a parent might tolerate or be unable to escape this problem — they may have regret about things that happened in the past or fear being abandoned. They might worry about social expectations and be too ashamed to speak up. 

How to Address Abuse from Adult Children

Addressing an abusive and problematic relationship can be overwhelming, but there are actionable steps parents can take to protect themselves and find support as they move forward. Understanding how to deal with disrespectful adult children can empower parents to set boundaries and protect their emotional health.

Set clear and firm boundaries

Firm boundaries with adult children can be vital in reclaiming control in a relationship. Boundaries communicate acceptable behavior and detail what will no longer be tolerated. For example, a boundary might mean you’ll no longer tolerate yelling or disrespectful language.  

“When setting boundaries, it is important to ensure they are clear and specific. Clearly state the behavior you will not tolerate and outline the actions you will take if the boundary is crossed. It is equally important to follow through consistently, as this reinforces the boundary and ensures its effectiveness. An example of follow-through would be calmly saying, “This conversation is over,” and then walking away or hanging up the phone if repeated behavior continued despite discussed boundaries.”

– Talkspace therapist Famous Erwin, LMHC, MA

Prioritize your safety

Prioritizing emotional and physical safety is essential when dealing with abusive behavior. Look for a safe place to go in case it’s needed. Always have a phone and contacts or emergency numbers accessible. If abuse continues or worsens, it’s time to involve the authorities, especially if there has been any physical threat of violence from your child.

Seek professional support for relationship issues or healing

Seeking guidance from a therapist or other mental health professional will help you process the abuse you’re dealing with. A good therapist provides a safe space to address and heal from the disrespect. A therapist can teach you coping tools, help you set boundaries, and show you how to prioritize self-care.

You can ask your child to go to therapy with you, or you can go on your own to heal from emotional abuse on your own.

Opportunity for clinician insight – Highlight how therapy can be helpful as you deal with or heal from abuse from children

Involve trusted family members or friends

Reach out to friends and family members you trust for emotional support and guidance — and let them intervene if necessary. Finding an ally will help you feel less alone and better equipped to deal with an adult child who’s being abusive.

Protect your financial and legal standing 

If you haven’t already done so, protecting your financial security must be a top priority once you realize you’re in a problematic and abusive situation with a grown child. The following will help to ensure your financial affairs are protected from disrespectful behavior and abuse:

• Review your bank account
• Double-check that your bills aren’t delinquent
• Check all legal documents 
• Make sure financial accounts and investments are appropriately titled and have the beneficiaries designated
• Double check you’ve legally appointed a Financial Power of Attorney (POA) you trust

Consider limiting or ending contact

If you’ve made efforts to address the abuse, but it’s still happening, you might need to limit or cut off contact. This will be extremely difficult, but protecting your physical, emotional, and financial well-being is necessary. If the situation becomes untenable, learning to navigate relationships with estranged adult children can help parents find closure and maintain emotional well-being.

Connect with community resources

If you’re looking for support, you can reach out to national and local agencies and organizations that provide assistance for anyone experiencing elder abuse. Engaging with your local community services often provides an excellent way to find much-needed support. You can find legal aid, financial advice, and counseling services to help you navigate this challenging situation. 

Reputable organizations that can help you include:

• National Elder Fraud Hotline: Helps older adults experiencing financial abuse.
• Adult Protective Services (APS): Investigates and intervenes in elder abuse cases.  
• National Domestic Violence Hotline: Offers support for any abuse, including from family members.
• Elder Care Locator: Connects older adults with local services and support. 

Finding Hope and Support for a Healthier Future

Recognizing and addressing the pain caused by abusive adult children requires incredible bravery as you work to reclaim your life. You don’t have to live without the safety, respect, and financial or emotional well-being you deserve. Seeking help from trusted professionals is a sign of strength, not weakness. 

Healing from an abusive adult child can cause guilt, grief, and other complex emotions, but you don’t have to go through this alone. Professional help and support with therapy can be a game-changer, giving you the tools you need to become confident and regain your self-esteem. Online therapy can help you process and cope with your experience in a convenient and accessible format. If you’re 65+, Talkspace offers online therapy covered by Medicare, making mental health support affordable too.

Take the first step and reach out to Talkspace today to learn more about online therapy. 

Healing from childhood sexual abuse is a profound personal journey. The pain abuse causes ripples through every aspect of an adult survivor’s life. From challenging relationships to a damaged sense of self-worth to mental health concerns like anxiety, PTSD, and depression, the repercussions of abuse are severe. In many cases, this trauma continues to affect a person throughout adulthood, influencing their emotional, social, and psychological well-being. Understanding the impact of childhood trauma in adults is crucial for effective healing.

Deciding to heal from childhood sexual abuse​​​ is courageous. It’s an act of hope and self-preservation, and while it’s not linear and won’t be easy, it is possible to find joy and peace again.

To reclaim your life after being sexually abused, you need the right tools and support. Read on to explore trauma-informed practices that are designed to help you heal. From practicing self-compassion to seeking help from a professional, you have a path forward to address this type of trauma. 

Acknowledge the Pain & Courage to Heal

The first step in learning how to heal from childhood sexual abuse is admitting the pain it caused you. It takes tremendous courage to start a journey like this, and validating your experience is an essential part of it. 

It’s not unusual for childhood sexual abuse survivor​s to feel overwhelmed. Many carry deep feelings of shame or guilt that make it difficult to process and deal with trauma. It can be challenging, but dealing with your emotions will empower you. Recognizing your pain and allowing yourself to feel it is the first step in reclaiming your life. 

Seek Professional Help

Working with a therapist or other mental health professional can become your lifeline. Look for someone trained in trauma therapy who can offer a safe, supportive environment. The right therapist will ensure you’re comfortable exploring your feelings so you can develop coping strategies.

There are countless therapeutic approaches, but two stand out for their efficacy in dealing with sexual trauma like childhood sexual abuse.

• Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR): EMDR is an evidence-based therapy that helps you reprocess traumatic memories to effectively reduce the emotional charge you experience. Research shows that EMDR is highly effective in treating post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), which is common in adult survivors of childhood abuse.
• Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): CBT is a widely-used therapy that focuses on identifying negative thought and behavior patterns so you can reframe them. Research shows that CBT can reduce many of the symptoms resulting from childhood sexual trauma, including PTSD, depression, dissociation, dysfunctional sexual behavior, and more. 

“Trauma-focused therapy was developed to bring an extra layer of compassion and understanding to the patterns of behavior that come from experiencing traumatic events. This therapy can expose how a person continues to express guilt and shame outside of their conscious awareness. By bringing these thoughts and behaviors to the forefront, new patterns can be embraced with compassion for self.”

– Talkspace therapist Dr Karmen Smith LCSW DD

Connect with Support Groups or Trusted Individuals

Many childhood sexual abuse survivor​s find strength and healing in sharing their experiences with others who relate to them. Support groups offer a unique sense of community, allowing individuals to share their stories, receive validation, and find understanding from people who truly relate. This connection can be incredibly comforting, helping to break the isolation that often follows sexual trauma. Studies have shown that social support plays a crucial role in coping with unresolved trauma. 

If joining a formal support group feels intimidating or uncomfortable, you don’t have to take that step right away. Reaching out to a trusted friend or family member for emotional support is a great alternative. Even just having someone who listens without judgment can be a valuable source of comfort and strength as you navigate your healing journey.

“Childhood sexual abuse can carry shame, which restricts the ability to talk about it. Trusting someone enough to share what they feel guilty about is a major step. There is a famous quote, “We are as sick as our secrets,” which may have some validity. When we hide our pain due to shame or guilt, it hinders our ability to love ourselves fully and, in turn, blocks us from deep connections.”

– Talkspace therapist Dr Karmen Smith LCSW DD

Journal Your Feelings and Experiences

Journaling is a powerful therapeutic practice that allows you to explore and navigate your emotions privately. By putting pen to paper, you can untangle complex feelings and gain clarity about past experiences. It’s not just a tool for self-reflection—it’s also a practical way to track your personal growth, identify emotional triggers, and manage stress and anxiety. 

In fact, research has shown that regular journal writing is linked to improved mental health and a greater sense of well-being. Whether you’re looking to understand your emotions more deeply or simply find a sense of calm, journaling offers a valuable space to focus your mind and nurture your mental well-being.

Practice Self-Compassion

Survivors of childhood sexual abuse often carry the heavy burdens of self-blame, shame, and guilt. These feelings can be deeply ingrained, but consciously practicing self-compassion can help begin the healing process. It allows you to challenge the negative self-talk shaped by your past and start reframing the way you view yourself.

Self-compassion is about acknowledging your pain without judgment. It’s a reminder that your experiences, no matter how painful, do not define your worth. If it feels hard, try to imagine offering yourself the same kindness and understanding you would give a close friend going through something similar.

Explore Mind-Body Practices for Trauma Recovery

Mind-body practices like grounding techniques, meditation, yoga, and deep breathing for anxiety are powerful ways to reconnect with yourself. These practices are not only calming but have been scientifically proven to reduce intrusive traumatic memories and help break the cycle of avoidance that often accompanies past trauma. By focusing on the present moment, they encourage you to ground yourself in the here and now, which can significantly alleviate anxiety and depression related to past experiences.

Establish Healthy Boundaries

Setting and enforcing boundaries is a vital step in your healing journey. Boundaries help you create a sense of control and safety, especially in your relationships, and are essential for fostering healthier connections in the future. Establishing clear boundaries empowers you to protect your well-being and prioritize your needs.

To create healthy boundaries, you first should identify what you need—whether physical space, emotional protection, or time for self-care—and communicate those needs firmly and assertively.

Examples of healthy boundaries include:

• Limiting contact with someone who triggers negative feelings
• Defining designated times for self-care
• Refusing physical touch that feels uncomfortable
• Saying “no” to situations, places, people, or conversations that feel unsafe
• Avoiding social events that are overwhelming
• Deciding what part of your story you’re comfortable sharing with others (this can differ from person to person)
• Taking the time you need to fully process your emotions so you can heal on your own timeline

Develop a Self-Care Routine

Self-care is a fundamental aspect of the healing process, providing a way to nourish both your mind and body. By making time for yourself, even through small acts of care, you can find moments of peace and joy that help balance the emotional and physical toll of past trauma. Whether it’s reading a book, spending time in nature, or rediscovering a hobby you love, these simple practices can offer a sense of comfort and well-being.

Research shows that self-care doesn’t just bring temporary relief—it can lead to lasting positive outcomes such as increased empowerment, improved relationships, and even post-traumatic growth. By prioritizing your own needs and well-being, you pave the way for healing and personal transformation, helping you build a stronger foundation for the future.

Allow Yourself to Grieve

Giving yourself time to grieve and heal from childhood sexual abuse is a necessary part of your recovery. Grief is a natural result of a traumatic experience. You might feel a range of emotions — including rage, sadness, anger, and fear — as you grieve the loss of trust, safety, or innocence caused by childhood abuse.

You need to let yourself feel these things without judgment so you can eventually create space for acceptance, which will help you move forward.

Consider Gradual Forgiveness (If and When Ready)

Forgiveness is a deeply personal decision that — if given — can bring peace to your life. It’s never about excusing the actions of your abuser. Some people find that forgiveness brings them closure and allows them to release any hold the abuse had on their lives. 

Whether or not you decide to forgive your abuser is entirely up to you. There is no right or wrong way to forgive. That said, if you do decide to forgive, it’s important to approach the process at your own pace.

Envision a Future Beyond the Trauma

The journey of healing from childhood sexual abuse can be long and overwhelming at times. Envisioning a future where you’ve worked through the trauma can help. Imagine your life filled with self-acceptance, growth, and peace. Take small but intentional steps toward your vision. You might pursue a dream, develop meaningful and deep, intimate relationships, or find joy in little moments throughout your days. Healing isn’t about forgetting your past. It’s about creating a rewarding and fulfilling future where your past doesn’t define you.

If you’re ready, therapy can be a vital resource when healing from sexual trauma — and online therapy can help. Healing from childhood sexual abuse is a gradual process, and it takes courage — but with the right tools, support, and self-compassion, it is possible to reclaim your future.

Content Warning: Sexual violence and assault are discussed in this article. If you or a loved one is the victim of rape or sexual assault, know that there are safe places you can go to find help and support. RAINN is an anti-sexual violence organization that’s partnered with over 1,000 assault service providers nationwide and offers confidential support 24/7.

Sexual assault takes many forms and impacts millions of people across the globe. According to the Department of Justice’s 2019 National Crime Victimization Survey, in the United States alone, there are more than over 450,000 rape and sexual assault victims each year. While sexual violence has a deep and lasting physical and emotional toll, there are many effective coping strategies that can help survivors heal. 

If you’re looking for support, you’ll need tools, like online therapy, to help you learn how to deal with being raped. It’s important to understand the impact sexual assault can have on you — keep reading to learn more. Remember, help is available if you need it. 

Updated 08/13/2024

That old saying you don’t have to hit to hurt is not wrong. Abuse doesn’t always involve physical violence. Language can be a way for an abuser to hurt and control their victim. Verbal abuse is a form of psychological abuse or emotional abuse that involves spoken and written words and, sometimes, even body language like gestures. 

Verbal abuse manifests through various harmful behaviors, such as constant insults, belittling comments, and derogatory remarks, meant to undermine one’s confidence. It includes tactics like the silent treatment, manipulative threats, and efforts to isolate the victim from friends and family. It can also involve indirect, non-verbal aggression, such as slamming doors, throwing objects, and damaging personal belongings to intimidate.

Learn more about the signs, examples, and effects of verbal abuse, and how talking to an online therapist can help if you are experiencing it.