Quick Summary

• Naming your emotions helps reduce their intensity and gives you clarity.
• You don’t need to wait for a crisis to strike. Connecting early with trusted friends or family is a courageous act of self-care that strengthens your support network and eases loneliness.
• If close contacts aren’t available, use helplines, peer groups, or online forums for a nonjudgmental connection.
• When no one is available to talk, expressive writing, journaling, or voice memos can reduce mental clutter and promote self-healing.
• Therapy is a valuable resource at any stage—not just for emergencies. It helps process emotions, improve relationships, and build resilience. 

Do you ever feel like you’re carrying around an invisible backpack? Maybe it’s full of fear or sadness. Maybe you don’t know what’s inside, you just know it’s heavy.

If you frequently find yourself feeling overwhelmed, isolated, or simply tired of holding it all together, you may have had the thought “I need someone to talk to.” If this sounds familiar, but you aren’t sure if things are “bad enough” to seek help for your mental health, this article is for you. 

You’re not alone in feeling this way, and needing support doesn’t make you weak, broken, or dramatic. Experts agree that social connection doesn’t just support improved mental health but also protects against detrimental physical health outcomes, too. 

Connection isn’t just a luxury, it’s a lifeline. Even if the people around you aren’t emotionally available, there are safe and nonjudgmental places you can turn to to feel heard and seen.

Start by Naming What You’re Feeling

When emotions start to swirl together — stress, anxiety, anger, grief — it’s easy to get swept up in the storm. Slowing down to specify what exactly it is that you’re feeling is like dropping an anchor in choppy water. It won’t make the storm go away, but it can give you something to hold onto. Here are a few prompts that can help you name your feelings more clearly:

• What emotions am I feeling in my body now?
• What am I trying to carry on my own?
• How do I feel in my physical body when things get hard, scary, or overwhelming?

If you’re not in the habit of naming what you’re feeling, it can be difficult to identify your emotions clearly at first. Some psychologists recommend using the wheel of emotions, which describes the full range of human emotions that stem from the six basic emotions as described by pioneering psychology researcher Paul Ekman — anger, disgust, sadness, happiness, surprise, and fear.

Even a few simple words like “I feel invisible” or “I’m scared and I don’t know what to do” can be powerful. When we name what we’re feeling, we give it less power over us. It’s okay if you don’t have the “right” words to describe exactly how you feel. The simple exercise of naming your experience can be enough to shift how you relate to it. 

Reach Out To Someone You Trust

You should know that you don’t have to be in a full-blown crisis to benefit from more connection. If you’re just feeling off, untethered, or emotionally worn out, reaching out to friends or family before things escalate isn’t just wise, it’s a courageous act of self-care. If you’re not sure where to start, try one of these gentle openers to get things going:

• “Hey, do you have a minute? I’ve just been feeling a little overwhelmed and could use someone to talk to.”
• “I’m not looking for advice or solutions, just someone to listen. Would that be okay?”
• “Can I share something with you that’s been weighing on me?”

If you’re thinking, “I need to talk to someone, but I’m not suicidal,” know this: you don’t have to wait for a crisis to reach out. You deserve support for what you’re going through now, no matter how small it might seem.

“Reaching out to someone you trust, such as friends or family, can help you strengthen connections with others and alleviate feelings of loneliness.”

– Talkspace therapist Dr. Olga Molina, D.S.W., LCSW

Explore Nonjudgmental Support Options

Not everyone feels safe or comfortable opening up to close friends or family. That’s okay. Maybe the people in your life aren’t great at listening without trying to fix things for you. Maybe they’ve rejected or minimized your feelings when you’ve tried to talk to them in the past. Maybe it’s just easier to talk to someone with a few degrees of separation from you. 

There are supportive spaces that exist just for this purpose, without judgment or pressure. For example:

• Helplines: Confidential and anonymous services can offer immediate emotional support. If you live in the United States, you can call or text 988 for mental health crisis support or 1-800-622-HELP (4357) for treatment referral or information services.
• Peer support groups: These offer solidarity with others who’ve been through similar experiences. In-person and virtual options are available.
• Online forums: Sometimes, it’s just easier to open up to a stranger than someone you know. Online platforms offer the comfort of anonymity to help you process without fear of judgment.

Turn To Writing or Voice Notes If No One’s Available

We’ve all been there at some point — it’s 2 a.m. and you’re lying awake with a barrage of thoughts that won’t stop spiraling. In moments like these, self-expression can be a powerful release, even if there’s no one around to receive it. In fact, research shows that the simple act of writing down our emotions can be a powerful tool to aid self-healing and personal growth. Consider these strategies:

• Journaling: A flow-of-consciousness style journal entry can help you release whatever’s on your mind. Don’t worry about grammar, syntax, or how it sounds when it comes to journaling for your mental health. Just write whatever comes to mind.
• Voice memos: Speak your thoughts aloud into a voice note app. It might feel awkward at first, but it can create real relief. 
• Letters you don’t send: Write a note to someone, even if you never plan to send it. This can help you process interpersonal feelings or let go of anger, grief, or resentment towards that person.

Even if you can’t talk to someone in real time, just getting your thoughts out of your head and onto paper can reduce mental clutter and lighten your emotional load.

Don’t Wait Until It’s “Bad Enough” to Seek Therapy

There’s a therapy myth that seeking support is only necessary when things fall apart. However, therapy should not be considered a last resort. It’s a tool for self-reflection and growth at any stage of life, whether things are going well or not. Don’t fall prey to the idea that you need to hit a breaking point to benefit from mental health help. The earlier you seek support, the more empowered you’ll be to navigate life with resilience and clarity for years to come. For example, therapy can help you:

• Parse out confusing or overwhelming emotions
• Process relationships and life transitions
• Understand and regulate your emotional responses and actions
• Learn how to express yourself without fear or self-editing

The benefits of therapy are real and measurable. Research shows that talk therapy can reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression, improve relationship quality, and even rewire the brain’s stress response over time. 

“Consider seeking a professional therapist if you feel that you have no one to talk to. Therapists will listen without being judgmental and will help you express your feelings and problem-solve issues that you are facing.” 

– Talkspace therapist Dr. Olga Molina, D.S.W., LCSW

It’s common to think that no one will get it, but challenge yourself to prove that idea wrong. With the right therapist, therapy can be a grounding space to feel heard, seen, supported, and valued. If you don’t find the perfect fit with the first therapist you meet, that’s normal. Finding the right therapist is like dating. You wouldn’t expect to meet your perfect match after one first date.

Remember, you don’t need a diagnosis or a crisis to benefit from ongoing therapy. All you need is the willingness to show up for yourself, which is, in itself, a powerful first step toward healing.

Find Someone To Talk To With Talkspace

Whether you open up to a friend, a therapist, a peer group, or even your own journal, reaching out for connection is a profound form of self-respect and an integral part of a self-care routine. Every time you give yourself permission to speak up and ask for what you need, you remind yourself that your needs matter.

With Talkspace, connecting to a licensed online therapist is simple and flexible. Whether you prefer messaging, video, or phone sessions, you can start therapy and access support on your terms, from wherever you are. No long waitlists or pressure to explain everything at once. Just compassionate, professional care at your fingertips. Get started today.

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Content warning:  This article discusses suicide, which may be triggering for some readers. If you are struggling with serious suicidal thoughts, please reach out for support. In the U.S., you can dial 988 to connect with the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, or seek immediate medical attention if you are in danger.

Struggling with your mental health can be isolating, overwhelming, and scary, especially if you’re in a dark place and are having suicidal thoughts. It’s important to know you’re not alone. Support is available and relief is possible. You can take simple, immediate steps to stop the cycle of suicidal thinking, so you feel safer and in control. 

Read on to learn how to stop suicidal thoughts​ and why having a personal safety plan can help when things feel too heavy to handle. 

Suicidal Thoughts Are a Sign of Pain, Not Weakness

Suicidal thoughts are often a sign of deep emotional suffering. They’re not because you’ve failed, you’re weak, or you use attention-seeking behavior. Suicidal ideation often comes from deep pain caused by overwhelming emotions or trauma. Having suicidal thoughts can feel like you’re completely alone in this world, but it’s more common than you might know. 

Recent research from the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) found that more than 12.3 million adults in the United States have experienced suicidal thoughts, 3.5 million made plans to end their own lives, and 1.7 million actually attempted to die by suicide. 

If you’re thinking about taking your own life, it’s crucial to understand that those thoughts aren’t permanent—feelings aren’t forever, even if they seem desperately urgent or all-consuming right now.

Immediate Actions to Take When You’re in Crisis

If you’re currently in a mental health crisis or have a history of suicidal thinking, there are proven steps you can take right now to help yourself, even if things seem overwhelming. 

Remove access to harmful tools

When you’re having dark thoughts, it’s essential to remove access to things that could be dangerous. It’s critical, even if it’s only temporarily, if you’re considering self-harm. Experts note that limiting access to lethal items is a life-saving step that can prevent suicide. 

Reach out for help

If possible, call, text, or contact someone in your life you trust. Sometimes, even just voicing your feelings out loud can ease the pressure you’re feeling. 

Use grounding techniques

Grounding practices have been found in research to: 

• Promote calmness
• Reduce anxiety
• Regulate heart and respiratory rates
• Improve mood and cognitive function
• Enhance sleep quality

Grounding techniques, such as deep breathing exercises, yoga or meditation, and mindfulness activities, can help you bring yourself into the present and reduce distress. Research shows that even a few minutes of deep breathing can immediately calm you down and help improve your mood. 

If you’re in crisis and need emotional support, call, text, or chat with a crisis line by dialing or texting 988 in the U.S. You are not alone.

Creating a Personal Safety Plan

A personal safety plan is your emotional first-aid kit. It’s a written guide you create to use when life feels like it’s too much to handle on your own. Having a plan ready before you need it reduces the risk of acting on your thoughts. It can provide a sense of control over your emotions. 

“Writing out a safety plan, either on your own, with a therapist, or a trusted person in your life can make a significant difference in managing suicidal thoughts. The safety plan often includes the following: identifying your warning signs, both emotional and physical cues that alert you to being in a heightened state of concern; a list of strategies that can help in these moments (safe distractions like TV, music, movement, art/crafts, grounding exercises such as square breathing): a list with phone numbers of safe people to contact (friends, family, therapist, medical doctor, religious leader); a list of crisis hotlines either by voice or text lines; the address of the closest emergency room.”

– Talkspace therapist Jill Daino, LCSW-R, BC-TMH

In studies, only 1 in 10 people with suicidal thoughts had a safety plan, but those who did exhibited higher levels of coping and help-seeking behavior. Safety plans can give you something to turn to when things feel out of control. Here’s what your safety plan should address or include. 

Identify your warning signs

When you have suicidal thoughts, there might be emotional cues that occur leading up to a crisis point. Being able to identify them allows you to use coping skills to recover before your symptoms worsen. Be aware of:

• Racing thoughts
• A looming sense of dread
• Feeling numb
• Increased agitation
• Feeling hopeless or worthless
• Feeling like you’re a burden
• The urge to withdraw from others
• Sleeping more
• Difficulty sleeping
• Intense depression symptoms or emotional pain
• Inner turmoil
• Thoughts like “I just can’t do this anymore,” “It would be so much easier if I just disappeared,” “Nobody would miss me if I were gone,” or “Things will never get better—what’s the point?”

Other physical signs to be aware of include your body feeling heavy, lacking the energy to do things you once loved, or feeling like you don’t want to see people you care about. These can all be early warning signs. Noticing them can help you act or seek help before it’s too late. 

List your coping tools and safe distractions

Having even a short list of tools or distractions to reference in times of crisis can be beneficial. Don’t worry about what you think you should put in your plan. List what you know will actually help you. There’s no right or wrong way to make a safety plan. Use things you know are calming and can refocus your attention away from dark thoughts. Make sure your list is easily accessible and includes contact information for loved ones. 

Writing down the plan, rather than keeping it in your head, is important. It gives you something tangible to rely on if your mind is cloudy or hope feels impossible. 

Some powerful depression coping skills include:

• Listening to your favorite song
• Going for a walk or hike outside
• Drawing, coloring, or doodling
• Talking to your “safe person”
• Practicing your favorite grounding techniques
• Working out

“You can keep a written safety plan in several places in your home or with you if you are away from home and have a digital copy in your phone. Having it written out ahead of time makes it much easier to stay safe in moments of crisis, since in those moments it can be difficult to come up with what to do, and having the safety plan makes it clear as to what steps to take to stay safe and get support. It is also a reminder of the hard work you are putting in to manage these thoughts and gives you control over taking the next steps to support yourself during these difficult times.”

– Talkspace therapist Jill Daino, LCSW-R, BC-TMH

Reaching Out for Support

Having thoughts about suicide is incredibly lonely, but you don’t have to go through it alone. While it’s common to worry about burdening others or fear that people won’t understand, support can come in many different forms. You may have a close friend or family member you trust, or you can start therapy or join a support group. 

Speaking up and asking for help can be difficult, especially if your dark thoughts include shame or numbness. Even if you’re intimidated or scared to ask for help, it can be the first step in lifting the heaviness in your life. 

If you’re unsure about what to say, try simple phrases, like the following:

• I’m really struggling right now. Can you help me?
• I’m having a tough time and could use you. 
• I’ve recently been having some dark thoughts, and I really need your support. 

If you don’t have someone to talk to

If you feel like you don’t have a friend or family member you can reach out to, there are still safe and supportive options available:

• School counselors, teachers, or campus mental health centers
• Community mental health clinics
• Support groups
• Online forums and peer-support communities for mental health
• Suicide prevention hotlines and text lines

If you’re in the United States, you can dial or text 988 to connect with the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline and speak with trained counselors immediately. You can also visit 988lifeline.org for additional resources and support.

Challenging the Lies Suicidal Thoughts Tell You

Suicidal thoughts distort reality. They can convince you that you’re not worthy of love, nothing will ever get better, or the world will be better off without you in it. While these thoughts can be powerful and persuasive, remember that they’re just thoughts. They’re not facts.

These are symptoms of your pain. This type of thinking is known as cognitive distortions. They’re thought patterns that exaggerate a sense of hopelessness and convince you that you’re not strong enough to survive. 

Common distortions include:

• All or nothing thinking: Black and white thinking that filters out any gray areas and makes things seem worse than they are. For example, you might eat one unhealthy snack when you’re trying to change your eating habits, and then you find yourself immediately thinking, “I’m a total failure. I may as well give up on eating healthy for the rest of the day.”
• Catastrophizing: You jump to the absolute worst scenario or outcome despite having no real evidence. You might realize you made a mistake at work and automatically convince yourself that you’re definitely going to be fired. 
• Personalization: You feel responsible for things you can’t realistically control, which causes feelings of shame or anxiety and a low sense of self-worth. Maybe a friend doesn’t respond to your text right away, so you start thinking you did something wrong and that they’re mad at you. 

If any of these resonate with you, try reframing your thoughts. Focus on what you know to be true. Remember that your mind is powerful, and it can convince you of things that aren’t real. If you’re struggling to separate distorted thinking from reality, journaling for your mental health or talking to a therapist can help.

“Suicidal thoughts are often scary and overwhelming; at the same time, they can contribute to someone not seeing the whole picture in those moments. It is like tunnel vision when in pain. Being able to zoom out and talk through these thoughts with a licensed mental health professional offers hope, strategies to manage challenging thoughts and feelings, while at the same time building compassion for yourself. The pain of suicidal thoughts can be worked on in a safe manner with a therapist who can listen non-judgmentally and offer alternatives to manage life’s difficulties.”

– Talkspace therapist Jill Daino, LCSW-R, BC-TMH

Finding Long-Term Help and Healing Through Different Types of Therapy

During low or difficult periods when you’re in a dark place, ongoing mental health support is critical. If you’re having recurring or chronic suicidal thoughts, ongoing therapy can offer a consistent, judgment-free space to process your feelings and learn tools to manage your pain. Studies show that nearly 96% of people who go to therapy report fewer suicidal thoughts.

The types of therapy that are known for helping with thoughts of suicide:

• Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): CBT is a type of talk therapy that helps you identify and change unhealthy and unhelpful thought patterns. It offers coping mechanisms and encourages you to challenge cognitive distortions that may be linked to suicidal ideation.
• Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT): DBT is commonly used to help people manage intense emotions like suicidal thoughts. This form of therapy teaches practical skills and focuses on emotional regulation and distress tolerance.
• Trauma-informed therapy: If the source of your pain roots back to trauma or loss, trauma-informed therapy can help you process difficult memories and build resilience.
• Mindfulness and meditation techniques: Mindfulness and meditation help quiet the mind, allowing you to focus on yourself and the present moment, even in times of distress.

Get Mental Health Help with Talkspace

If you’re looking for professional mental health help, you can start your therapy journey with Talkspace. We connect you with licensed, experienced, qualified therapists who are trained to guide you during times of crisis. With text messaging therapy, flexible scheduling, and a judgment-free space to find support, you don’t have to struggle in silence. If you’re wondering how to stop having suicidal thoughts​ but aren’t sure where to get mental health help, Talkspace can provide resources through a licensed therapist.

Whether your pain has lasted for years or it’s something new, you deserve care that’s accessible, affordable, and meets you where you are. Contact Talkspace today to discover how online therapy can make healing a possibility.

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Summer is supposed to be the season of sunshine, freedom, relaxation, and fun—so why are you so drained? If you feel like you’re running on empty when you thought you’d be carefree, summer burnout might be to blame. It’s a real phenomenon, and it can seriously impact your life and well-being. 

Burnout during the summer months isn’t talked about or recognized as much as other types of burnout (like when it’s work-related). Summer burnout is the emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion that occurs when your expectations clash with the reality of your life. It’s tied to the unique pressures and disruptions that come with the season. Here, we’re sharing what causes summer burnout, how to recognize the signs, and practical steps you can take to reclaim your energy and enjoy the warm months of sun and fun. 

What Contributes to Summer Burnout?

Summer burnout can be tricky to spot, and it can catch you off guard. It’s a season filled with promises of rest and relaxation, but there are stressors and other factors that make it surprisingly exhausting. If you’re feeling more overwhelmed than uplifted this summer, the following reasons might be to blame. 

Disrupted routines

We rely on routine. Most of us do best when our days have structure and predictability. If you’re used to a steady flow of schedules, work, school, family, self-care, and other responsibilities, the lax days of summer can be hard to adjust to. The kids are home from school, you’re planning and going on vacations, the days are longer, and dinners are later. It can leave you feeling off-balance and burned out, and it’s not all in your mind, either. Research shows that disrupting daily routines is linked to increased symptoms of anxiety, depression, and stress.  

Work-life balance

On the surface, summer feels like it should be a time to slow down and enjoy life, but for many people, the opposite happens. You might be covering for coworkers on vacation or looking for someone to help you out. You may suddenly find yourself juggling new or shifting deadlines, trying to achieve a proper work-life balance, and having a hard time setting and respecting your boundaries. Any of these can be a major driver of burnout, and they can intensify as the summer months go on.

Social exhaustion

As fun as summer can be, the nonstop social events, like barbeques, weddings, reunions, play dates, pool days, and trips, can leave you feeling more drained than ever. The pressure to say yes to everything in your personal life becomes overwhelming, especially if you’re an introvert or already feeling stretched too thin. You might even start dreading planned activities (even ones you once looked forward to).

“We all have a social battery, and while opportunities to connect with friends and family in the summer can be fun, it can also be depleting with the calendar too packed, which drains your social battery. Even though it is summer, the demands from family and work aren’t magically less, yet the expectations for “summer fun” can increase exhaustion and stress. Make sure to build in time to restore and learn to say no!”

– Talkspace therapist Jill Daino, LCSW-R, BC-TMH

Heat and sleep disruption

The summer heat can affect your quality of sleep and overall mood, and poor sleep makes you more vulnerable to burnout. So, if you’ve felt crankier, more tired, or like your brain fog is worse lately, the hot weather may be a factor. Studies show that heat exposure heightens stress levels and increases irritability. Research done by the American Psychological Association (APA) also found that heat affects cognitive function. 

The pressure to be happy or productive

By the time summer rolls around, you’re desperate to make the most of it. After all, it’s time to get out, make memories, and live your best life. This has probably always been the general attitude around summer, but today, social media amplifies it. There’s a constant pressure to live up to the expectations and have “the best summer ever,” which can cultivate a negative relationship between social media and mental health. Scrolling through post after post of once-in-a-lifetime vacations, Pinterest-worthy parties, and endless productivity can leave you feeling like you’ve fallen short. 

“While the world has created many opportunities for social media moments to highlight so-called “happy” and “productive” lives, be that around the holidays, birthdays, or summer time fun, it is crucial to remember that what you see in that snapshot moment is not what is going on behind the scenes. Ask yourself, does the pressure to create that “super fun productive” summer align with your values for what you want for yourself and/or your family? What moments do you want to remember and reflect on? What is meaningful to you? When you answer those questions, the pressure can lessen as you listen to yourself and not the outside noise.”

– Talkspace therapist Jill Daino, LCSW-R, BC-TMH

Signs You Might Be Experiencing Summer Burnout

Unfortunately, burnout isn’t always easy to recognize. It can sneak up on you and show up in the subtlest ways. If you experience any of these things, it might be time to step back, reflect, and hit pause so you have time to recharge. 

Emotional symptoms

Burnout is associated with several emotional symptoms, including:

• Irritability 
• Feeling unusually impatient
• Persistent sadness 
• A sense of emptiness, even if everything seems good 
• Increased anxiety about plans, work, or relationships
• Feeling detached or like you’re just going through the motions
• Lack of motivation 
• No enthusiasm for things you usually enjoy

Physical symptoms

In addition to emotional signs of summer burnout, it can manifest in physical symptoms, like:

• Difficulty falling or staying asleep
• Feeling tired even when you get enough rest
• Headaches
• Muscle tension
• Unexplained aches and pains
• Change in appetite, including eating more or less than usual
• Frequent colds 
• Feeling run down 

Behavioral signs

There are behavioral symptoms of summer burnout to be aware of, too, including:

• Withdrawing from social activities
• Avoiding plans you were looking forward to
• Procrastinating 
• Struggling to complete tasks (at work or home)
• Relying more on substances like caffeine and alcohol to cope
• Neglecting self-care routines, like exercising, eating well, prioritizing sleep, or engaging in hobbies

How to Beat Summer Burnout

Summer burnout isn’t inevitable, and even if you think you have it, making adjustments to your life can turn things around. Even small changes will help you reclaim the season so you can avoid summer burnout and start enjoying your days again. 

Reintroduce structure into your days

If summer suddenly means no routine, try adding a little structure to your life. You don’t need a rigid schedule for summer—try starting with a consistent wake-up time or bedtime. Eat meals at regular times and create short morning or evening rituals. 

Prioritize rest and hydration

Rest and hydration are often underrated, but they can be powerful, easy ways to restore energy and improve mood. Even mild dehydration can affect your energy levels and mood. 

Set boundaries with social plans

If you’re constantly on the go and you can feel it wearing you out, take back your power by saying no when you need to. Summer doesn’t have to mean your calendar is overflowing with invitations and commitments. It’s OK to decline, scale back, or cancel when you need to. Downtime is essential for your well-being, and setting boundaries is healthy. 

“While it can be challenging, remember NO is a complete sentence! It is up to you to protect your own stores of energy and mental well-being. Giving grace to yourself as you would to a friend is crucial. Being able to say no if it is in your best interest will also allow you to say yes when you really want to and are able to for other opportunities.”

– Talkspace therapist Jill Daino, LCSW-R, BC-TMH

Create cool, calm spaces

When your environment works for you, it can become your sanctuary. Use fans and blackout curtains to keep your home cool and comfortable. Run the air conditioning if you can. Use soft lighting and aromatherapy. Minor tweaks to your surroundings can make you feel more peaceful, even if the outside world is overwhelming. 

Practice mindfulness and self-care

Mindfulness is a great way to reconnect with yourself and manage stress and anxiety. It’s been shown in research to reduce anxiety, stress, and depression. Try breathing exercises for anxiety, meditation, or gentle movement to recenter yourself. 

Seek support if needed

We’ve discussed how high social demand can affect summer burnout, but feeling lonely during summer can feel just as harmful. Don’t be afraid to seek help if you need it. Summer can be tough, but you don’t have to survive alone. Talk to a friend, family member, or therapist if you need guidance or coping strategies to get through. 

Protect Your Peace this Summer 

If you’re dealing with summer burnout and aren’t sure what to do, know that you’re not alone, and you’re not failing. More people than you think are in the same position. Taking care of your mental health is critical if you’re struggling. It’s just as important during the summer months as it is any other time of the year. When routines shift and social demands ramp up, it’s time to be kind to yourself. 

Small changes to your daily routine—like getting enough rest, setting clear boundaries, and maintaining a calm environment—can positively impact your life and overall well-being. This summer, you deserve a break that replenishes you, not one that wears you down. If you need support, Talkspace offers online therapy that fits into your life. Whether you’re home, traveling with kids or on your own, or trying to balance a demanding schedule, online therapy can be empowering. With Talkspace, protecting your mental health can be an easy and convenient way to prevent or manage summer burnout. 

Discover more tips for navigating seasonal mental health and get support with online therapy from Talkspace today.

Homelessness isn’t always black and white. In fact, for most unhoused people, it doesn’t look like the images we see on the evening news at all. It might mean couch-surfing with a friend after getting kicked out of the house or sleeping in the car after a late shift. You might have a phone and a job, but just no address to call home right now. Whatever homelessness looks like for you—or how you got there—it’s not easy, and you deserve support and encouragement, not judgment.

In this guide, we’ll provide tips for surviving homelessness, whether it’s your first night having nowhere to go or just the latest chapter in your quest to get back on your feet. We’ll cover how to stay safe, protect your essentials, and nurture your mental health along the way. 

No one can promise that it will be easy, but by reaching out and refusing to give up, you’ve already taken the first step in the right direction.

“You are not alone, and your current situation does not define your worth or future. Help is out there, even if it feels hard to reach. You deserve support, safety, and care.”

– Talkspace therapist Bisma Anwar, LPC, LMHC

1. Prioritize Safety

No matter how many different things you think you need to figure out right now, dealing with homelessness starts with prioritizing your own safety first. If your environment is changing from day to day, this might mean thinking ahead, even if just a few hours at a time.

If you’re sleeping outside or in your car, choose a spot that’s well-lit and visible over an area that appears more isolated. Think strip malls with 24-hour businesses—like Walmart—and rest stops, or public spaces with security cameras. If you’re spending the night alone, consider checking in with someone you trust to let them know where you’ll be.

Trust your instincts. If you find a spot that feels convenient, but a little sketchy, avoid it. Keeping a flashlight, whistle, or pepper spray nearby can add another layer of protection and help you feel more secure. If you’re in immediate danger or feel threatened, don’t chance it. Call 911. You have every right to protect your body, peace, and space. 

“When someone doesn’t feel safe anywhere, grounding through the senses can be a way to anchor themselves in the moment. Try focusing on your breath, noticing specific sights or sounds around you, or repeating something steadying like a positive phrase or mantra. These are simple actions that can create a moment of stability to help you move through the crisis.”

– Talkspace therapist Bisma Anwar, LPC, LMHC

2. Find Shelter and Housing Resources

If you’re not familiar with having to find a safe place to sleep, whether that’s one night or more long-term, it’s difficult to know where to begin. However, there are resources available to help you.

A good place to start is calling 211. This is a free, confidential hotline that can connect you to local shelters, crisis housing, and support programs. If you don’t have access to a phone right now, try visiting a local library for internet access and go online at 211.org. 

The United States Department of Housing and Urban Development also offers homelessness assistance. You can find a local representative or community member in your area by going online here. If you can’t access a shelter right away, ask about motel vouchers, safe parking programs, or day centers that offer rest, showers, and strategies for securing long-term assistance. 

3. Take Care of Your Basic Needs

Surviving homelessness means taking extra care to ensure your basic needs—water, food, rest, and basic hygiene—are met. This is the foundation you’ll build on later.

Ask around about local food banks, community fridges, or church meal programs in your area. Websites like feedingamerica.org can help you navigate local options. For staying hydrated, carry a reusable water bottle for quick refills at public parks and fast-food restaurants.

Sleep where and when you can safely, even if this means adjusting your normal routine. Many day shelters and YMCAs also offer showers and laundry. 

4. Practice Small Acts of Self-Care

When you’re so focused on trying to make it through another night, it can be easy to let your emotional health fall by the wayside, but remember that your mental health is part of survival, too. A daily self-care routine doesn’t need to be fancy or expensive. Start with simple acts of self-kindness that feel meaningful for you.

This might mean keeping small comforts with you, like a photo of a better time or a grounding object, or journaling for mental health during moments of calm. Your current living situation doesn’t define you. 

If feasible, try moving your body a little each day, even if it’s just a short walk to a park. Physical movement and time spent in nature are proven strategies for reducing stress and keeping your mind at ease.

5. Protect Your Belongings and Identity

Keeping your essential items safe is a key part of surviving homelessness. Start with what’s most important: your ID, passport, birth certificate, and social security card. You will need these to maintain access to shelters, healthcare, jobs, and housing programs. 

Store them close by—on your person if possible—in a sealed, waterproof bag. It’s also a good idea to make virtual copies of these and save them to a secure email account or cloud storage. 

If you don’t have an ID, make that a priority. A shelter or outreach worker may be able to advise you on what you need to do and where you can receive mail that’s addressed to you.

6. Use Public Resources & Community Services

Thankfully, there are community services and public resources that you can turn to. Public libraries are a great starting point. There, you can access free Wi-Fi, computers, and a quiet place to apply to jobs or seek housing resources.

If you need medical care, look for community health clinics or Federally Qualified Health Centers. If you’re uninsured, you may still be able to receive care at a discounted rate. Find a community health care center near you by searching here.

7. Stay Connected to Others

Unfortunately, in our society, the burden of homelessness often comes with the additional weight of stigma or shame. That can tempt you into wanting to disappear or avoid friends and family, but it’s important to fight that urge.

Isolation might feel like another form of self-protection, but connection is the real lifeline. One study showed that people with stronger social relationships had a whopping 50% greater likelihood of long-term survival. 

You don’t need to be on social media to stay connected, though if you are, that can help, too. Call a trusted friend once in a while when you need someone to talk to, or chat for a few minutes with the librarian who remembers your name. 

“Isolation can cause feelings of hopelessness, anxiety, and depression for people experiencing homelessness. Without connection or support, it becomes more difficult to cope with daily challenges, seek help, or feel seen. Over time, this lack of social contact can negatively impact emotional well-being and make recovery more difficult.”

– Talkspace therapist Bisma Anwar, LPC, LMHC

8. Make a Long-Term Plan When You Can

Sometimes, your biggest concern while homeless is finding the next warm meal or place to sleep. However, when you find yourself with a few extra moments of breathing room, begin to forge a long-term plan. It doesn’t have to be solid. The idea is just to give yourself a framework and goals to move toward.

If you need to replace essential documents, start there. Figure out what you need to do to acquire those items, and tackle each step one at a time. Your local shelter or social services office might be able to help cover fees or provide mailing addresses.

Next, set small yet realistic goals like:

• Applying for food assistance
• Checking in with your caseworker
• Applying to one or two jobs per week
• Getting on a housing waitlist

Don’t try to do it all at once, but make a list of what you want to achieve and start with the most important things first. 

9. Know Your Rights While Homeless

Housed or unhoused, you still have legal rights. These can vary by state and city, but there are basic protections everyone should know. For example, you have the right to emergency care, to vote, and to access public services, like libraries and transit.

Some cities enforce urban camping laws that make sleeping in public places illegal. Knowing local ordinances can help you avoid fines or confiscation of your belongings. Talk to a trusted community member if you need clarity about laws, regulations, or enforcement.

If you feel targeted or mistreated because of your housing status, document everything, including names, dates, and what was said or done. A legal aid organization may be able to provide more guidance.

You Are Not Alone: Help Is Out There

Losing your housing doesn’t mean you’ve lost your worth, your future, or your right to ask for help when you need it. There are people, programs, and communities that want to support people experiencing homelessness. Reaching out is an act of strength, not weakness.

The emotional toll of homelessness can be overwhelming. In moments like these, caring for your mental health is just as important as meeting basic needs. Oftentimes, there are free resources available within your local community. Whether you seek online therapy or practice self-care, there are things you can do to take care of yourself today.

Getting kicked out—whether by your family, a partner, or a roommate—is one of the most disorienting and terrifying things a person can experience. It can feel like the ground has suddenly been ripped out from beneath you when the place you once called home no longer feels safe or accessible. 

Being kicked out of your home is a deeply personal situation, but it’s not uncommon. It’s important to remember that it’s not a failure on your part. Many people have been through a similar experience and found a way to get back on their feet. 

Right now, you don’t have to have all the answers. Although it may feel overwhelming at the moment, you can take things step by step to make sure your immediate needs are taken care of. If you don’t know what to do when you get kicked out of your home, here are 8 steps you can take.

1. Prioritize Your Immediate Safety First

Your immediate safety should be your first priority. If you’re not physically safe in your current location, focus on getting to a safer place, even temporarily. If you’re in immediate danger, call 911 for help. If that’s not an option, consider going to a public place like a library, hospital, police station, or even a 24-hour diner. 

It’s natural to feel panicked and disoriented when you get kicked out of your home, especially if it happened suddenly. Take a few deep breaths to ground yourself. Remember that you don’t have to fix everything today. Focus on making sure you’re safe first, then you can move on to the next thing. 

“When someone is in crisis and trying to find a safe place to stay, one of the first things to do is breathe. To manage panic or overwhelm in the moment it is time to recalibrate. By taking intentional breaths to reset your thinking into a state where you can plan and strategize as opposed to panicking which shuts down the thinking part of the brain.”

– Talkspace therapist Dr. Karmen Smith LCSW DD

2. Look for a Place to Stay Tonight

Once you’re physically safe, your next step is to look for a place to stay, even if it’s just for tonight. Start with your most accessible options. Friends, family, coworkers, or neighbors who may be willing to let you stay for a night or two. 

When asking for help with a place to stay, you don’t have to get into details about why you got kicked out of the house, but it’s important to be honest about your situation. You can say you’re in a tough spot and need a temporary place to stay. 

If family and friends aren’t an option, seek nearby shelters. Many cities offer free services to people in a housing crisis. You can start with the Homeless Shelters Directory or by calling 211, where you can search for homeless shelters in your city. 

If you’re a teen wondering how to survive being homeless temporarily, Safe Place may be able to help. You can visit the website to search for a Safe Place site near you or text the word “safe” to 4HELP (44357).

If you’re affected by domestic violence, you can search for local shelters using your zip code on the National Domestic Violence Hotline website. 

3. Gather Your Essentials (If You Can)

If you still have access to the place you’ve been kicked out of and it’s safe for you to go back, gathering some essentials can help you prepare for your next steps. 

Here’s a list of essentials you should try to grab:

• Identification (such as your driver’s license, passport, or school ID)
• Phone and charger
• Medications 
• Credit/debit cards and cash
• Bank records 
• Change of clothes
• Hygiene items
• Health insurance card 

If you have more time, try to gather other important documents such as your social security card, birth certificate, and legal documents.

Don’t risk harm by going back if it’s not safe. Although having these essentials can make things easier, remember they can always be replaced, and protecting your life and safety is more important. Some shelters or other organizations can help you replace these documents, if needed. 

4. Know Your Legal Rights

Depending on your situation, you may have some legal protections. If you’re under 18, your parents or guardians have a legal responsibility to care for you and must make arrangements for your care. Child Protective Services, a school social worker, or a local youth shelter may be a good resource for you in this situation. 

If you’re over 18, you may have legal rights as a tenant, even if you’re living in a place without a lease. Legal aid groups can help you understand your rights. You can start with LawHelp.org to find help in your area. If you’re affected by domestic abuse, the National Domestic Violence Hotline can help you find a legal provider near you.

5. Plan the Next Few Days

Once your immediate needs are met and you’re safe, you can take the first steps to plan your next few days. Don’t try to plan your entire future right now. Focus on one thing at a time and think about just the next few days.

To help you plan, start by asking yourself the following questions:

• Is there anyone I trust who can help me right now?
• Do I have access to my ID and other important documents?
• Do I need to replace anything I left behind?
• Where can I stay tomorrow?
• Do I need time off work or school?
• Should I contact a shelter, crisis center, or legal aid organization?

Make a list of the things you need to do, but don’t feel pressure to do it all at once. Try to prioritize what you need to do first and take it one step at a time. 

“If you feel frozen by all the unknowns in a situation, it is best to talk to someone who knows about the resources and the options that are available, as they can suggest the best course of action. You can then be empowered to make the best decision for you, but you need to understand the options that are available.”

– Talkspace therapist Dr. Karmen Smith LCSW DD

6. Let Yourself Feel the Emotions

Being kicked out of your home, especially by someone you trusted, is a painful experience. It can bring up feelings like shock, shame, fear, grief, rage, and betrayal. You may even feel numb. 

Once you’re safe, give yourself space to feel your feelings. You’re allowed to grieve what you’ve lost, even if you’re also relieved to be out of a toxic environment. If your emotions feel overwhelming or out of control, you can try to use some simple relaxation techniques to feel more grounded. Try taking a few slow, deep breaths in through your nose while you let your belly, not your chest, expand. Then exhale gently through your mouth while letting your belly fall. 

Using a relaxation technique doesn’t change how you feel, but it can help your nervous system settle enough to keep going. 

“I’ve been kicked out before and had a 6-month-old at the time. I told an acquaintance, and she was calm and could offer suggestions, which I found very helpful. I had a strong knowing that this was temporary and not a permanent condition of victimization. My first advice would be to call on your resources, listen, and identify your options. Second is to know that this too shall pass. It’s helpful to envision yourself successful and permanently housed.”

– Talkspace therapist Dr. Karmen Smith LCSW DD

7. Utilize Local Free Resources

You don’t have to navigate getting kicked out alone. Many communities have free resources designed to help people in crisis. You can start by calling 211 or visiting 211.org. The operator can help you find shelters or crisis centers near you. A public library, healthcare center, or faith-based organization may have additional resources to help. 

Seek specialized programs to meet your needs. For example, if you’re part of the LGBTQIA+ community, an organization like True Colors United may be able to help. If you’re under 18, the National Runaway Safeline is available 24 hours a day. They can also help with free transportation to a safe place to stay.  

Using free resources doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means you’re taking steps to protect yourself and get the support you need. These resources exist to help people going through hard times in life. 

8. Explore Long-Term Housing Options

When you’ve addressed your short-term needs, you can begin to think about more long-term solutions. Long-term housing options may include:

• Staying with a friend or relative
• Applying for transitional or supportive housing programs
• Looking into room rentals or shared housing options
• Reaching out to social services or nonprofit housing organizations 

Keep in mind that getting long-term housing can take some time, so it’s important to be patient. You may also consider asking for help from a social worker to navigate the resources available to you and guide you through the application process.  

FAQs About Getting Kicked Out

Getting kicked out of the house with nowhere to go raises many urgent questions. Here are some of the most common concerns, along with resources to help you find immediate support. 

Where can I sleep if I get kicked out?

You can start by contacting a trusted friend or family member. If that’s not an option, look for a shelter near you. Resources to help find a place to sleep tonight include:

• Homeless Shelter Directory
• 211.org 
• National Domestic Violence Hotline
• Safe Place

You can also check your local library, hospital, or churches to learn more about resources in your area.

Can someone legally kick me out without an eviction notice?

Eviction laws differ depending on where you live and whether your name is on the lease. In many states, even if you don’t have a formal lease, you may still be considered a tenant. That means you can’t be kicked out without proper notice. 

A legal aid organization, like LawHelp.org, can help you learn more about what rights you have in your state. Community organizations can also help protect your tenant rights. You can check JustShelter.org to find a directory of community organizations in your area that can help. 

Can my parents kick me out of the house?

If you’re under 18, it may be considered neglect or abandonment to kick you out of the house. If this applies to you, there are organizations available to help teens navigate the next steps. If you’re over 18, your parents can ask you to leave, but they still may need to follow local laws regarding eviction. Seek help from a lawyer if you’re unsure. 

Can a roommate legally kick me out without notice?

Your roommate can’t kick you out of the house without proper notice. This is especially true if your name is on the lease agreement. Even if you’re not on the lease, many areas still require a formal eviction process. In most cases, changing the locks or forcing you out of the home without notice is usually illegal. 

Where can I sleep if I have no money or ID?

Many shelters and crisis centers offer free emergency housing without money or an ID. Some shelters even help you replace your ID and other essential documents. 

How do I get into a shelter?

The requirements can differ between shelters. Many will accept walk-ins during their intake hours, but some shelters require you to call first. Arrive early, if possible, because space is often limited. 

Take Care of Your Mental Health, Too

Surviving being kicked out of your home requires more than just a roof over your head — it also takes emotional strength. Even after you’ve found a safe place to stay, the experience can still feel mentally exhausting, scary, and lonely. It’s normal to struggle with anxiety or sadness as you adjust to this big change. 

Emotional support is as important as physical safety and shelter. Talking to someone you trust can help you process what you’re feeling and build coping skills. Therapy can be a valuable resource for building emotional resilience. 

If you’re concerned with how to pay for therapy, Talkspace offers flexible plans that might fit your budget or be covered by insurance. With Talkspace, you can talk to a licensed online therapist from anywhere. Reaching out for help is a courageous step that can make a difference as you navigate this challenging time. 

Internalized ableism describes when you absorb society’s negative beliefs about a disability. It can make you want to hide your disability, doubt your sense of self-worth, and make it difficult to seek support when you need it. Your feelings might stem from stigmas, biases, or limitations, and the process is often unconscious. Internalized ableism can also make you question your value and feel shame about your identity. Research shows that internalized ableism can even lead to anxiety, depression, isolation, powerlessness, and feelings of inferiority.

It’s essential to know that internalized ableism isn’t a personal failure. It’s a natural reaction to being in a society that equates worth to health and ability. It’s also important to understand that once you recognize ableist views, there are actionable steps you can take to unlearn them so you can start to embrace disability pride in your own life.

Common Signs of Internalized Ableism

You may not notice when internalized ableism has started to creep into your thoughts or influence how you behave. It can be as subtle as a quiet voice in your head, making you second-guess your abilities. Or, it can be more obvious, like feeling embarrassed or ashamed about needing accommodations.

Knowing and understanding ableist tendencies is the first step in overcoming their harmful impact on life and relationships. Here are several signs of internalized ableism.

Feeling like a burdens

Living with a disability often means you need assistance in various aspects of your life. Whether it’s with daily tasks, transportation, or mobility, asking for help isn’t something to feel bad about. Yet, you might feel selfish, worry that it seems like you’re seeking attention, or fear that you need too much or are inconveniencing others. Even when your requests are reasonable, internalized ableism can make you feel like you’re a burden.

Downplaying or hiding your disability

It’s not uncommon to hide or downplay a disability. You might avoid using a mobility aid like a cane, hide the pain you’re in, or pretend you’re not struggling with fatigue.

Trying to “blend in” so others don’t see you as different can be a form of self-protection. Over time, though, it’s exhausting and reinforces an internal dialogue that you’re not good enough or worthy (which is untrue).

Measuring self-worth by productivity

We live in a society that measures worth through output. A mindset like this can be especially harmful when you live with a disability. Tying your value to how much you can do—at work, school, or in social situations—while disregarding your needs for accessibility or rest will almost always backfire.

You shouldn’t feel guilty about needing help or downtime. Pushing yourself to keep up with the people around you is unreasonable and unfair.

Comparing yourself to “more deserving” disabled people

It’s easy to compare yourself to others. When you’re living with a disability, it might feel like you need to prove you’re disabled “enough.” This can be even more true if you have a disability that’s not obvious or visible to others.

Don’t downplay your needs by convincing yourself that other people are worse off and, therefore, more deserving of help. Comparisons like this make it difficult to advocate for yourself. They can also exacerbate feelings of shame and inadequacy.

Resisting identity-based labels

Hesitating to use words like “disabled” or “neurodivergent” out of fear of being judged is understandable. You might want to use less direct terms or try to avoid discussing your disability altogether. Internalizing shame like this isn’t healthy, though. While labels can feel heavy or unfair, especially since they’re often stigmatized by society, embracing them can be empowering and help you work towards self-acceptance.

“Internalized ableism can really mess with your mental health. When you start believing all the negative stuff society says about disabilities, it can make you doubt yourself, ashamed, anxious, or even depressed.”

– Talkspace therapist Famous Erwin LMHC, LPC

Where Internalized Ableism Comes From

Internalized ableism happens slowly, over time, and is shaped by the world around you and society’s views on living with disabilities. Discrimination and bias against disabled people are, unfortunately, deeply ingrained in our world. From media to culture to institutions, ableism shows up due to the belief that value comes from health, ability, and independence.

• Cultural messages and media representation: When you grow up without representation or accommodations, you might start to internalize harmful norms without even realizing you’re doing it. Maybe you didn’t see people who look, sound, or act like you on TV or in movies, books, or leadership roles.
• Lack of institutional support: Your school or work environment might not have the support you need or respond to your requests for aid in adequate ways.
• Social and family influences: Perhaps your family, friends, and social circles encouraged you to “just get over” your disability instead of helping you embrace it.
• The pressure to overcome: You might have heard well-meaning intentions like, “Don’t let your disability stop you from doing anything you want.” The problem with this is that it reinforces the idea that your capabilities should be conquered, not accepted. The more you believe this though, the more likely it is that you’ll adopt ableist beliefs.

How to Overcome Internalized Ableism

It can be difficult, but unlearning internalized ableism is possible. It will take time, dedication, self-compassion, patience, and community, but you can do it. Every step you take toward accepting your authentic self will help you overcome these thoughts.

Here are some simple ways to change your mindset and discover value in your abilities.

Validate your lived experience

Remember, your needs are valid. Accessibility isn’t negotiable. If you’ve been told you’re too sensitive or that things “just aren’t that bad,” remember that your experience is real and should be acknowledged.

Family support and access to safe spaces can be instrumental in helping you feel validated. If you don’t have a strong support system, ongoing therapy can help.

Engage with the disabled community

You are not alone on this journey. Seek community and connect with others who understand your perspective and experience. The support of people who know where you’re coming from can be incredibly healing and give you a new perspective on your life.

Follow creators, advocates, and influencers you admire on social media. Seek online content or media created by and for people with disabilities. Join support groups or attend community events.

Reclaim empowering language

Words matter, and feeling comfortable using labels—like disabled—with pride instead of shame can help you feel powerful. Let your language be a tool that affirms your life.

Take your time finding words and language you’re ready to embrace. Defining your identity isn’t always easy, but it’s something that will help you build confidence so you feel more comfortable in your own skin. It can be helpful to reflect on what you think about common labels. For example, are you more comfortable with “neurodivergent” or “disabled”?

Give yourself permission to sit with how you feel, without judgment, and then use words that honor your comfort level and lift you up. You can also take cues from the disabled voices you follow or admire. Notice how they talk about themselves, their disability, and their experiences.

Reframe independence and productivity

Just because you need help or rest doesn’t mean you aren’t strong, independent, or productive in life. It just means you know your limits and are able to honor them. Interdependence (relying on others and letting them depend on you) is a regular, healthy part of human nature. Remember that your value isn’t dependent on what you can or can’t do.

Remind yourself that self-care, such as rest, balance, and accessibility, are rights you deserve, not weaknesses you’re succumbing to. Everyone needs these things in life to ensure well-being, and you’re no different in that sense. Look into self-care ideas tailored to your needs to ensure you get the most out of your downtime.

Seek support through therapy or peer spaces

Therapy can help you identify, process, and understand what internalized ableism is. It’s also an effective way for you to develop self-compassion and start seeing how ableism is impacting your life. Likewise, peer-led groups can offer validation that comes from a shared understanding of your experiences.

Working with a therapist who’s skilled in disability-affirming care and exploring the benefits of group therapy are excellent ways to process ableist views so you can heal. Seek out mental health professionals who understand disability justice and create spaces to help you honor interdependence.

“It’s important to find therapists who understand disability justice. This means they see disability as part of who you are, not something that needs to be fixed. Good therapists make you feel safe and respected for who you are. They help build trust and know that everyone needs help sometimes. Instead of just trying to fix problems, they support you in a way that helps you feel stronger and more confident.”

– Talkspace therapist Famous Erwin LMHC, LPC

Moving Forward with Pride

Unlearning internalized ableism isn’t easy, and it won’t happen overnight, but it can be done. Even if you’ve spent years hiding your true self, ignoring your needs, or downplaying your worth, change is possible. Every small step you take toward living a self-compassionate life is progress.

Your disability isn’t something you need to overcome. It’s something you can live with and have pride in, and you can find the self-respect you deserve. Disability pride means accepting who you are now. You can recognize and be proud of your strengths, and you can advocate for your needs without apology.

If you need support, Talkspace is here for you. We connect you with affirming mental health professionals who can help you navigate the unique challenges and strengths that come from living with a disability. Whether you’re trying to navigate internalized stigma or need help advocating for access, Talkspace can help you if you’re disabled or neurodivergent. We also offer online therapy covered by Medicare and accept most major insurance providers, so cost won’t prevent you from seeking care. Reach out today to learn more.

In today’s fast-paced, high-stress world of constant connection, carving out time for self-care isn’t just a luxury—it’s essential. Self-care is more than bubble baths and face masks (though those can be lovely, too). It’s about tending to your mental health, physical health, and emotional well-being in a way that feels restorative and sustainable. 

There’s no perfect self-care routine; there’s only the one that works best for you. In this guide, we’ll walk you through how to create a personalized, daily self-care routine that feels realistic and nourishing to your mind and body rather than like another item on your to-do list.

Understanding the Importance of Self-Care

The first thing to know is that self-care isn’t selfish. It’s a foundational practice that helps you show up more fully in every area of your life, from work to relationships to your own personal growth. Research shows that when done with intentionality and consistency, proper self-care can:

• Lower stress levels and reduce anxiety
• Improve mood and emotional regulation
• Boost energy and focus
• Prevent burnout and chronic fatigue

Don’t fall prey to the idea that self-care is indulgent. Whether it’s a few mindful breaths between meetings or a leisurely stroll in the park, these self-care practices fuel resilience, productivity, and emotional balance. Think of them as tools to protect energy and prioritize your needs.

Steps To Create a Personalized Self-Care Routine

Curating a daily self-care routine starts with tuning into your own needs and building habits that genuinely support your well-being. This process is personal and, at times, experimental. Give yourself permission to take it one step at a time and make adjustments as you go. 

Assessing your current needs and challenges

Before you start building a self-care list, it helps to reflect on where you’re currently feeling stretched thin or burned out. You might start by asking yourself:

• Where am I feeling the most drained mentally, emotionally, physically, or socially?
• What areas of my life feel neglected or could use more support?
• What coping skills do I lean on when I’m stressed or overwhelmed?

These reflections can happen through journaling, quiet contemplation, or open conversations with someone you trust. Consider the following mental health journaling prompts to get started:

• “Lately, I’ve been feeling most stressed when…”
• “An area of my life I know needs more care is…”
• “When I imagine feeling balanced, it looks like…”

Identifying activities that nourish you

Once you have a clearer picture of what you need, brainstorm activities and practices that recharge you. These might include quick daily-care practices like listening to music you love, stepping outside for fresh air, or unwinding at the end of the day with a good book. 

Here are a few journaling prompts to help you brainstorm:

• “A time I felt deeply calm or joyful was when I…”
• “Three things that help me reset emotionally are…”
• “Small habits that give me energy include…”

You might also include weekly or monthly activities like going on a day trip, attending a creative workshop, or having an uninterrupted evening to yourself. Aim for a blend of short-term resets and long-term plans. 

Setting realistic and achievable goals

A common self-care trap is trying to overhaul everything at once. Start small by adding one or two habits, and give them time to stick before adding more. You might anchor a new habit to an existing routine, like doing a quick body scan after brushing your teeth, or setting a two-minute timer to try breathing exercises for anxiety before bed. Keep your goals short, simple, and flexible at first. Then, adjust as your needs evolve. 

Consider these journaling prompts to reflect and build your own routine:

• “One small self-care habit I can start this week is…”
• “Something that feels doable (not perfect) for me right now is…”

Building self-care into your daily schedule

Let’s be real — if it’s not on your calendar, it probably won’t happen. When you carve out dedicated time, a self-care routine becomes a natural part of your day rather than something you have to remember to squeeze in. 

If your schedule already feels overbooked, look for small windows of opportunity. Maybe it’s stretching while your coffee brews or turning your devices off for a brief digital detox before bed. These simple, easily repeatable actions can create a strong foundation for your self-care routine with no major life overhaul required. 

Balancing different types of self-care

To create a well-balanced self-care routine, aim for a mix of practices that nourish your emotional, physical, social, spiritual, and intellectual needs. Whether it’s calling a friend, moving your body, or discovering a new thought-provoking podcast, having variety can help you feel more grounded and resilient, even during life’s most demanding seasons.

Consider one of these prompts to get the ideas flowing:

• “I feel emotionally cared for when I…”
• “A physical habit that helps me feel strong, energized or rested is…”
• “I feel most spiritually connected when..”

“I recommend a self-care practice that involves connecting with nature, spending a few minutes outdoors each day, and, when possible, planning longer nature-related trips. A client told me she did not have access to nature. I told her to find a tree and take food, a blanket, and sit under it. The tree has a healing energy that helps us relax and tune into a caring, quiet energy, which is essential for self-care.”

– Talkspace therapist Dr. Karmen Smith LCSW DD

Self-Care Ideas to Include in Your Routine

Self-care isn’t a single activity — it’s a collection of practices designed to meet your needs in different ways. Here, we’ll provide a wide range of self-care routine ideas across different areas of wellness, so you can build a routine that reflects your unique values, needs, and preferences.

Emotional self-care

Emotional self-care includes anything that allows you to express your feelings in a healthy way, create space for your emotions, and stay connected to what matters most. Research shows that cultivating emotional resilience promotes well-being and productivity by shielding against daily stressors and promoting adaptability. This type of self-care often requires slowing down and offering yourself the same kindness you’d extend to a friend. 

An emotional self-care routine might include:

• Journaling about your day or emotions
• Talking to a therapist or joining a support group
• Practicing meditation or focused mindfulness techniques 
• Setting boundaries with friends and family by saying “no” to things that don’t serve you
• Taking a mental health day from school or work

Physical self-care

Physical self-care practices include the basics, like eating nourishing meals and getting enough sleep, but also the small habits that help you feel strong, energized, and rested. Movement doesn’t have to mean intense workouts; it could be stretching, jogging, or dancing in your living room. Listen to your body and give it what it needs, without judgment. 

For example:

• Prepare nutritious meals that fuel your body
• Prioritize good sleep hygiene
• Stay hydrated
• Attend a weekly workout class or join a nearby gym

Social self-care

Connection is a core tenet of well-being. Practicing good social self-care starts with building and nurturing relationships that uplift and support you. That might mean reaching out to a friend just because, or setting aside time each week to connect with people who make you feel heard and seen. Whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert — or a little bit of both — fostering meaningful connections can help you feel more grounded in your everyday life. 

Here are a few more social self-care routine ideas:

• Schedule a weekly coffee date or shared activity with a friend
• Join a social club or group that reflects your interests
• Practice open and honest communication

Spiritual or mindfulness self-care

Spiritual or mindfulness self-care helps you slow down, reconnect with yourself, and find a renewed sense of peace or purpose. Whether through prayer, meditation, time in nature, or creative expression, this type of self-care can be deeply personal. You don’t need to follow a specific tradition to feel spiritually grounded; it’s about whatever helps you feel centered and present in your life. 

Spiritual self-care might look like:

• A daily gratitude practice
• Walking in nature without your phone
• Prayer or meditation
• Creative outlets like painting, singing, or creative writing

“Incorporating different types of self-care practices strengthens emotional resilience and reduces the risk of burnout because it offers diversions from a singular focus on providing. When we are driven by family responsibilities or deadlines to provide for others or a job, the result can be self-depleting. Self-care practices fill the tank so that you can continue to give while also receiving. Burnout can be caused when givers don’t allow themselves to receive.”

– Talkspace therapist Dr. Karmen Smith LCSW DD

How To Stay Consistent With Your Self-Care Routine

Sticking to a self-care routine doesn’t mean doing the same thing every day without fail. It means committing to care for yourself in ways that adapt to your life. Some days will be easier than others, and that’s normal. With a little planning and flexibility, your self-care routine can evolve alongside you. 

Here are a few simple strategies to help you practice self-care consistently and make these techniques a natural part of your everyday life:

• Use habit trackers or apps to build momentum
• Set gentle reminders using calendar alerts or sticky notes
• Celebrate small wins to stay motivated
• Adjust your routine when needed

Remember, self-care should feel like support, not another source of stress. If something’s not working, change it.

“Self-compassion plays a key role in maintaining long-term self-care habits and preventing shame spirals when routines are disrupted. Self-compassion starts with your inner dialogue. Speak kind words to yourself, don’t shame or guilt yourself with your own thoughts. Instead, be your own cheerleader, advocate, and caregiver. These roles we may find easier to step into for others, but shifting the focus to you is self-care.”

– Talkspace therapist Dr. Karmen Smith LCSW DD

Moving Forward: Building a Routine That Grows With You

It might help to think of your self-care routine as a living thing; something that you can revisit and revise as your life circumstances change. There will be busy weeks, emotional dips, and unexpected challenges. The goal isn’t to be perfect but to keep showing up for yourself in the best way you can.

If you’re unsure of where to start or need help staying on track, Talkspace is here to help. Our licensed online therapists can help you create a personalized, sustainable self-care plan that fits your life and supports your mental health goals.

You don’t have to figure this out alone, and you don’t have to do it perfectly to start feeling better. You just have to start. Talkspace can offer support as you work to take care of yourself and improve your mental health and overall well-being.

Whether we’re entering a new year, beginning a new life phase, starting a project, or setting goals of any kind, we have to admit that many things will be beyond our control. No matter how carefully we plan, life might have other plans!  That’s why it’s important to invest in mental resilience. When you’re mentally resilient you’re better able to roll with whatever challenges or unexpected twists and turns the future holds.