Understanding Childhood Trauma

The term childhood trauma refers to disturbing and distressing occurrences of physical, sexual, or emotional abuse, neglect, and household dysfunction experienced during the formative years. 

Childhood trauma can, and often does, have a profound impact on healthy emotional development and overall well-being. It’s linked to long-term consequences and increases the risk of poor mental health and substance abuse. Some research suggests that children who experience trauma are twice as likely to develop a mental health condition in the future. Childhood trauma survivors also have a higher likelihood of struggling to form and maintain healthy relationships as adults.

Signs of Childhood Trauma in Adults

Symptoms of childhood trauma in adults can manifest in many ways. They can widely vary from person to person and are often influenced by factors like the severity and duration of the traumatic experience. The type of trauma can also play a huge role in the symptoms an adult experiences later in life.

The availability of support systems — either in childhood or in adulthood — and the use of coping mechanisms can also impact how trauma shows up later in life.

Signs of childhood trauma in adults can include:

• Emotional dysregulation
• Relationship difficulties
• Self-destructive behaviors
• Chronic health issues
• Hypervigilance

Emotional and psychological signs

Emotional and psychological signs of repressed childhood trauma in adults can include persistent or uncontrollable feelings of fear, anxiety, and depression. Regulating emotions or establishing healthy attachments to others can also be challenging.

Common emotional and psychological signs of childhood trauma include:

• Flashbacks or intrusive memories: Many adults experience vivid flashbacks of the traumatic events they once experienced. These can be triggered by very specific cues or reminders of their past.
• Low self-esteem or self-blame: Adults who harbor feelings of worthlessness, shame, or self-blame due to trauma often develop a negative self-image.
• Dissociation: Some adults try to disconnect from their feelings or thoughts as a way to deal with overwhelming emotions about their abuse.
• Difficulty with trust: Adults who went through trauma in their youth might struggle with trust, fear, betrayal, or abandonment trauma, which can impair the ability to form and maintain close and meaningful relationships.
• Mood swings: Mood swings can be prevalent for adult survivors of trauma. Fluctuations in mood can range from anger to sadness to irritability to despair, often with no warning.
• Sleep disturbances: Re-experiencing traumatic memories during sleep is not uncommon. It can cause insomnia, nightmares, or other sleep disturbances.
• Hypervigilance and startle response: People who survive abuse often have a heightened sensitivity to threats, whether they’re perceived or real. This can lead to an exaggerated startle response or needing to remain in a constant state of alertness.

Behavioral signs

Behavioral signs of repressed childhood trauma in adults can include:

• Avoidance behavior: Adults with repressed memories might withdraw to avoid situations, people, or places that remind them of their trauma.
• Self-destructive behaviors: It’s common for adult survivors to engage in risky or harmful behavior — like substance abuse or self-harm — in an attempt to numb their emotional pain.
• Compulsive behaviors: Compulsive behaviors — like excessive hand washing or counting rituals — might be ways some people try to cope.
• Isolating from others: Survivors of abuse might avoid social interactions with others out of fear of harm or rejection.
• Impulsive behavior: Some adults are impulsive or engage in risky behaviors — like unsafe sexual practices.
• Disordered eating: Using food to try and cope with past trauma and regain a sense of control isn’t uncommon.

The Impact of Childhood Trauma on Adults

Childhood trauma can have profound and lasting effects on an individual’s life, shaping their adult experiences in multiple areas, especially in personal relationships and overall well-being. Understanding these impacts can help in recognizing the signs and seeking appropriate interventions.

“Our past has a great impact on how we view and interact with the world around us. We aren’t always aware of it because we are busy living our life. However, the relationships we form, how we interact with others, and how we react to situations are some ways our past experiences dictate how we deal with situations in the present.”

– Talkspace therapist Minkyung Chung, MS, LMHC 

Personal relationships

Adults who experienced trauma during their childhood often face significant challenges in their personal relationships. These difficulties manifest in various forms:

• Intimacy issues: Struggling to create or maintain close and secure bonds.
• Difficulty developing and maintaining meaningful relationships: Often stemming from trust issues or a distorted perception of social cues.
• Challenges expressing emotions: Individuals may feel blocked or uncomfortable sharing their feelings.
• Interpersonal conflict: Increased likelihood of misunderstandings and conflicts in relationships.
• Anger, impulsivity, and emotional dysregulation: Unresolved trauma can lead to difficulties in managing emotions, which impacts interactions with others.
• Unhealthy attachment patterns — avoidance or clinginess: These patterns can lead to unstable relationships.
• Repeating the cycle: Without intervention, there is a risk of perpetuating the same harmful patterns learned in childhood.

These challenges significantly affect how individuals form and maintain relationships, often necessitating professional help to break the cycle and foster healthier interpersonal dynamics.

“Someone who came from an absent or neglectful family may end up seeking acceptance and belonging with others in a way that can be harmful to them. It’s not uncommon for individuals with childhood trauma to struggle with some level of mental health instability. It’s important to work through these trauma to find the right overall balance.”

– Talkspace therapist Minkyung Chung, MS, LMHC

Well-being

The repercussions of childhood trauma extend beyond interpersonal relationships, affecting the overall well-being of the individual. The psychological and physical health challenges associated with an adverse childhood experience include:

• Mental health conditions: Adults with a history of childhood trauma are more susceptible to various mental health disorders, including adult depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and borderline personality disorder (BPD), with childhood abuse or trauma being a recognized risk factor.
• Physical health conditions: The ongoing stress from unresolved trauma can manifest as several physical health issues like cardiovascular disease, autoimmune disorders, chronic pain, or substance abuse.
• Self-care and grooming: Childhood trauma can leave adults lacking basic self-care skills and struggling with personal hygiene, dental care, and household management. Neglect during childhood can result in difficulties with these essential tasks, impacting their overall quality of life.

Additional struggles such as low self-esteem and difficulty functioning due to hypervigilance, dissociation, or intrusive memories further complicate the individual’s ability to lead a fulfilling life.

Addressing these issues often requires a comprehensive approach involving mental health professionals, supportive relationships, and sometimes medical intervention to manage the physical ailments linked to chronic stress.

How to Treat Childhood Trauma in Adults

Treating childhood trauma in adults is most effective when a combined approach is used. Therapy, medication, and coping techniques can all be hugely beneficial in the healing process.

Therapy

Trauma therapy can be tailored to individual needs based on the severity and duration of the traumatic experience. Some types of therapy will be more effective than others, but like any trauma treatment approach, there’s no “one” or “right” way to deal with trauma. 

Commonly used forms of therapy include:

• Trauma-focused cognitive behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): Evidence-based, structured therapy that addresses the psychological impacts of repressed trauma. It helps people understand and process their experiences and teaches them to challenge associated negative beliefs.
• Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR): A highly specialized approach to therapy that helps people process traumatic memories through bilateral stimulation like rapid eye movement, tapping, and auditory tones.
• Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT): A comprehensive form of therapy initially developed to treat borderline personality disorder. It’s since been adapted to treat trauma using a variety of approaches.

“Treatment for childhood trauma, or trauma in general, has come a long way. It started with CBT but has evolved to other trauma-focused therapies. It is important to learn about each one and to ascertain which one might be the right fit for you. For instance, if choosing trauma-focused CBT, one would concentrate on changing negative thought patterns to positive thought and behavior patterns with an emphasis on the trauma. It is important to explore the different types of trauma therapy by talking to a therapist. They will be able to help discern the right treatment method, even if it isn’t with them.”

– Talkspace therapist Minkyung Chung, MS, LMHC

Medication

For some people, medication might be a valuable part of a trauma therapy treatment plan. Medication can help manage symptoms of childhood trauma in adults, especially when dealing with comorbid (occurring at the same time) depression, anxiety, or post-traumatic stress disorder. 

Types of PTSD medication that may help survivors of trauma:

• Antidepressants
• Anti-anxiety medication
• Antipsychotics
• Mood stabilizers

Note: Medication should only be used under the advice of a qualified healthcare professional who’s assessed symptoms, medical history, and treatment goals.

Somatic therapies

Somatic therapy is an alternative approach to psychotherapy. It focuses on connecting the mind and body and recognizes that emotional experiences are stored in the body. Somatic techniques like mindfulness, deep breathing, and movement can address childhood trauma symptoms in some adults.

Types of somatic therapies to treat childhood trauma in adults include:

• Somatic Experiencing (SE)
• Sensorimotor psychotherapy
• Trauma-informed yoga
• Massage therapy

Coping strategies

Coping techniques are designed to help adults deal with childhood trauma. A combination of emotional regulation techniques, self-care practices, and therapy usually gets the best results.

Effective coping strategies for childhood trauma may include:

• Mindfulness
• Grounding techniques
• Intentional journaling 
• Physical activity
• A solid support network
• Professional help
• Self-care
• Self-compassion and forgiveness

Heal from Trauma with Talkspace

If you want to get therapy from someone who understands how to treat childhood trauma in adults, Talkspace is an online platform that makes getting help convenient and affordable. Even if you’re considering medication, Talkspace offers diagnosis and medication management from qualified psychiatrists who are trained to deal with complex trauma recovery.

Connect with an online therapist at Talkspace today to start your journey and heal from your childhood trauma.

Trigger warning: This article discusses sexual trauma, which may be disturbing or distressing to some people. 

The World Health Organization (WHO) estimates that 1 in 3 women have experienced physical or sexual violence in their life. Sexual trauma can be devastating for your psychological well-being and leave negative lasting effects. It can destroy your faith in others and make trust excruciatingly difficult. Healing from the trauma of sexual violence is a profoundly personal experience. Recovery takes time, patience, and access to the right resources — it’s an emotionally taxing journey.

Sexual trauma refers to any unwanted sexual activity or behavior. It can result from rape, molestation, sexual harassment, or assault. How this type of trauma affects us can differ from person to person and depends on factors like:

• Personal perception
• Severity of the event(s)
• Support systems
• Previous trauma
• Access to professional support

It’s common for someone who’s experienced a sex-related trauma to have extreme feelings of fear, shame, guilt, anger, and sadness. It’s even common to feel numb. Sexual assault survivors  have symptoms similar to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and can have nightmares, flashbacks, and crippling anxiety or depression as a result of their experience. 

Though it can be difficult, it is possible to heal sexual trauma. Learn what you need to know about this challenging journey here.

Steps for Healing from Sexual Trauma

Understanding how to deal with being raped, sexually harassed, and any other sexual trauma is essential to be able to move forward. There are steps you can take to navigate the process of healing sexual trauma. The following are essential for you to consider if you need help learning how to get over sexual trauma.

Step 1: Seek professional help

Working with a professional who has experience in trauma-related therapy can be an incredibly beneficial part of your healing process. They can offer you the guidance and support you need and provide proven evidence-based treatments that are tailored to your experience and needs. 

“Because of the trauma experienced during sexual violence and the aftermath there are several types of therapy that can be done but the process is lengthy, types of therapy are but not limited to: cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT), art therapy, sex therapy, trauma processing, substance use counseling (if necessary), and animal assisted therapy.”

– Talkspace therapist Reshawna Chapple, PhD, LCSW

Some effective forms of therapy follow.

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)

CBT is a type of talk therapy that helps you identify and change negative, unhelpful, and unhealthy thought and behavior patterns as you’re healing from sexual trauma.

Eye-movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR)

Research has found that EMDR therapy can be an extremely effective therapeutic modality for survivors of sexual assault who are experiencing major depressive disorder (MDD) or having suicidal ideation as a result of their trauma.

Cognitive processing therapy (CPT)

Cognitive processing therapy (CPT) was developed to treat people with post-traumatic stress disorder. In some research, it has been shown effective in helping sexual trauma survivors improve. CPT helps you understand and change beliefs you have that are related to your trauma.

Somatic therapy

Somatic therapy focuses on the mind-body connection. It can help you release tension and let go of the trauma that’s been stored in your body. In studies, somatic therapy offered significant improvement in women recovering from childhood sexual abuse. 

Group therapy

Alongside individual therapy, group therapy for survivors of sexual assault can offer additional support when learning how to heal from sexual trauma. While this can be an effective therapy and form of treatment for some people though, more research is needed to fully understand its efficacy.

Step 2: Build a support system

Healing sexual trauma requires a strong support system. While the trauma may leave you feeling like you can’t trust anyone or want to be alone, support is going to be crucial as you navigate the healing process. Surround yourself with people who understand what you went through and can offer you compassionate, reassuring support. 

You might reach out to friends, family members, or support groups that are designated for survivors of sex-related trauma. 

Within your support system, it’s important for you to be able to:

• Talk openly about your experience
• Create and trust a safe space
• Become an advocate for others if you feel strong enough

Step 3: Foster self care

Prioritizing self care is always an important goal, but it becomes even more critical when healing from trauma like this. Take time for yourself, do activities you enjoy, and maintain a healthy lifestyle. 

Self care practices can include:

• Mindfulness meditation
• Doing yoga
• Taking time to enjoy your hobbies
• Journaling for mental health
• Going on daily walks
• Spending time with family and friends
• Reading a good book
  

“Self care can be divided into two categories: physical and emotional under the physical category activities of daily living are very important eating, sleeping, exercising or getting some sort of physical activity, And avoiding becoming overwhelmed by setting a routine. in the emotional category things like having fun, creating leisurely activities, journaling, listening to music, coloring or developing a hobby, socializing.”

– Talkspace therapist Reshawna Chapple, PhD, LCSW

Step 4: Set boundaries

As a sexual trauma survivor, it’s also important to set and enforce boundaries during this time. You should learn how to set boundaries in relationships, for when and how you communicate with others, and for your personal space. Setting boundaries will help you feel in control and safe so you can slowly begin to trust your surroundings again. 

You can create boundaries by:

• Making time for you to have personal space
• Asking people to call or text you before they come over
• Being willing to tell someone you’re not up for talking
• Expressing the importance of confidence when you open up to others
• Having the courage to request assistance when tasks prove challenging, rather than persisting in struggle alone.

Coping Strategies for Sexual Trauma

Part of learning how to get over sexual trauma means finding coping strategies. Coping tools can be incredibly powerful as you regain control over your emotions and thoughts. They can help you navigate your days and your relationships. 

It’s normal to be triggered or have flashbacks to your trauma — the following coping skills and techniques might be helpful. 

Talk to someone you trust

Find your “person” — that someone you can share your innermost feelings and be vulnerable with. This can be a family member, a peer, another trauma survivor, or even a therapist. Having someone you trust, and being able to open up to them, will be an emotional relief and outlet during the especially difficult times you might face in the coming days, weeks, and months.

Reconnect with your body through meditation, dance, or yoga

Mindfulness practices like meditation and yoga can help you reconnect with your body. These are effective tools that promote relaxation. When you engage in these activities, you learn to focus on the present, which can reduce the stress and anxiety levels associated with your trauma.

Process your feelings of shame and guilt

It’s expected that you’ll have feelings of shame and guilt, even though what you went through is in no way your fault. You are not to blame for what happened to you. 

Part of processing your feelings is recognizing when you’re experiencing unhelpful emotions like shame or guilt. While these types of feelings are normal, you must learn to process them so you can let go and heal. Learn more about guilt vs. shame and how to deal with these feelings. 

Seek counseling

Getting professional mental health care can be instrumental in your journey toward healing. A therapist can offer guidance and support while helping you learn coping strategies for your needs.

“Turn off the news or social media, have a safety plan, lean on your social supports, be patient and graceful with yourself, use grounding techniques, practice mindfulness, meditation and yoga, and avoid drugs and alcohol because they only numb the pain but do not help to heal.”

– Talkspace therapist Reshawna Chapple, PhD, LCSW

Moving Forward

To move forward, first and foremost, be kind to yourself. Work toward building resilience so you can make progress and minimize the lasting effects of sexual assault. You can move forward by:

• Embracing self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding. Be empathetic when you’re struggling. Acknowledge your pain without judgment, and remember you are not to blame.
• Establishing a support network: Surround yourself with people who love and care about you. You’ll likely need to rely on them for emotional support.
• Cultivating positive emotions: Do things that bring you a sense and feeling of joy and happiness. Spend time with loved ones or start (or pick back up) hobbies that fulfill you.
• Keeping a healthy perspective: Remember that healing is not linear. You’re going to have ups and downs along the way. Be patient and keep perspective so you can recognize progress, but understand this will take time.
• Set realistic goals: You won’t go from experiencing trauma to being fully healed overnight. Set small, attainable goals along the way. For example, a goal might be sleeping through the night, eating 3 healthy meals one day, or sitting alone in a public place. Small steps will add up to significant growth.

Embark on a Path to Healing with Talkspace

Talkspace is an online therapy platform that offers professional support and resources for survivors of sexual trauma and their loved ones. You can connect with an experienced and qualified therapist who specializes in healing sexual trauma so you can start on your path toward healing. 

Learn more about how you can get one-on-one sessions with a licensed Talkspace therapist. Your road to recovery will be long and likely filled with some challenges, but having the proper support and professional guidance can make all the difference.

What Are the Different Types of Trauma?

When we think of psychological trauma, we often think of a single event that causes great harm or pain. However, different types of traumas can occur throughout our lives. Trauma isn’t limited to physical events; it can also be emotional or psychological in nature. Some common trauma symptoms can include:

• Flashbacks or intrusive memories of the traumatic event
• Nightmares about the event
• Avoidance of people, places, things, or situations that remind you of the event
• Feeling numb or disconnected from others
• Difficulty concentrating
• Irritability
• Hypervigilance
• Confusion
• Exhaustion
• Agitation
• Sadness
• Anxiety
• Dissociation
• Chronic pain
• Difficulty sleeping
• Angry outbursts
• Depression
• Substance abuse
• Self-harming behaviors
• Suicidal thoughts or attempts
• Believing the world is a dangerous place and that you can’t trust anyone
• Feeling unable to experience pleasure

“Trauma can be caused by various situations ranging from natural disasters to abuse, vehicle accidents, and more.”

– Talkspace therapist Ashley Ertel, LCSW, BCD, C-DBT

While most people are familiar with the concept of trauma, many are unaware of the different types of trauma that exist. Trauma can be classified as acute, chronic, or complex.

1. Acute trauma

Acute trauma is a psychological trauma that occurs in response to a single, highly stressful event. For example, it can come after experiencing a natural disaster, seeing a bad car accident, or witnessing violence. Acute trauma can lead to long-term mental health problems if not appropriately addressed.  

Examples of acute trauma

Acute trauma can come from a single event threatening your life or safety. It can also result from an act of violence against you or after witnessing a traumatic event happening to someone else. 

This type of trauma can lead to acute stress disorder (ASD), which is a mental health condition typically appearing within 3 days of a traumatizing event and lasting up to 1 month.

2. Chronic trauma

Chronic trauma is a response to ongoing or repeated traumatic experiences. It differs from acute trauma in this sense, as acute trauma occurs after just one traumatic experience or event. 

Examples of chronic trauma

Chronic trauma can result from any of the following:

• Physical abuse: Physical abusers often use force to control their victims. They may hit, kick, choke, or throw things at them — the list goes on. It’s common for physical abusers to threaten their victims and use fear and intimidation to control them.
• Sexual abuse: Sexual abusers often take advantage of people who are weaker than they are. They may be in a position of power over their victim, making it easier for them to coerce or force them into sexual acts. Victims of sexual abuse often suffer from flashbacks, nightmares, anxiety disorders, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), sometimes even long after the initial event occurred.
• Emotional abuse: Emotional abusers try to chip away at self-esteem by putting their victims down constantly or making them feel bad about themselves.
• Domestic violence: Domestic violence can cause chronic trauma. It’s not always physical abuse either — mental and emotional torture can be just as debilitating. Domestic violence targets every aspect of a person’s life to control them. It leaves long-term scars that can be difficult to deal with for years after the abuse has stopped.
• Poverty: Growing up in poverty can result in chronic trauma. Children who grow up below the poverty line are more likely to see violence, witness drug use, and not have enough food or adequate shelter. This can lead to lasting effects such as anxiety, depression, PTSD, and more.

3. Complex trauma

Complex trauma is a type of stress similar to generational trauma that can occur when someone experiences multiple, chronic, or prolonged exposure to traumatizing events. It can happen to both children and adults. However, complex traumas like abandonment trauma, for example, are more common among those who experienced abuse or neglect during childhood.

Complex trauma can cause long-term problems with physical and mental health. Forming and maintaining healthy relationships can also be very isolating and challenging.

Examples of complex trauma

Complex trauma can harm mental and physical health due to repeated, continued traumatization. It can be the result of things like: 

• Childhood abuse or neglect
• Domestic violence
• Sexual assault
• War-related experiences

Common Causes of Trauma

Trauma can come from many places or experiences. It can happen to anyone at any time and has lasting effects. Some sources of trauma might include the following: 

Witnessing or experiencing violence

Witnessing or being directly involved in a violent act can be traumatizing. It might include seeing or experiencing domestic abuse, sexual assault, child abuse, war combat, or anything else that’s graphic and violent. 

Being involved in or witnessing a serious accident

A shocking accident can be jarring and cause trauma, whether you’re directly involved or just a witness to it. 

Abuse 

Physical, sexual, or emotional abuse can all be factors that lead to a traumatic response. 

Assault 

Rape or a violent assault can be the source of a traumatic reaction, whether you’re the one who experienced the attack or someone close to you did. 

Natural disasters

Earthquakes, floods, hurricanes, wildfires, or any other natural disaster can be more than just frightening. They can be traumatic, especially if they cause death, displacement, or food or housing insecurity. 

Death

Death — especially if it’s sudden or unexpected — of a loved one can be traumatic for anyone to cope with.

If you or someone you love has experienced any of the types of traumas we’ve discussed here, seeking professional help can be instrumental in learning to cope with the aftermath and healing. Trauma isn’t something you have to go through alone, and certain coping mechanisms like trauma dumping can do more harm than good.

“Determining who will develop a trauma-related disorder is incredibly difficult, as every person will respond to traumatic incidents in their own unique ways. It’s important to note that some people may experience an event as highly traumatic, while others may not experience the same event as traumatic. If you’re dealing with the effects of trauma, finding a trauma-informed therapist is an excellent option.”

– Talkspace therapist Ashley Ertel, LCSW, BCD, C-DBT

Learn How to Cope with Trauma with Talkspace

It’s important to be aware of the different trauma types so you can understand how they might impact your mental and physical health. If you’re struggling with the aftermath of trauma, please know that you’re not alone. Many people have been through similar experiences and understand what you’re going through, and therapy can help you heal.

When it comes to how to deal with trauma, online trauma therapy with Talkspace can make the process of getting help simple. In just a few clicks, you’ll be connected with a therapist who understands what you’re going through. Talkspace therapists are experienced in trauma therapy and can help you work through your feelings and recover from traumatic experiences you’ve endured. 

What Is Trauma Dumping?

Trauma dumping occurs when an individual shares their traumatic experiences without the recipient’s consent, often at inappropriate times or places. This act can place undue emotional pressure on someone who may not be prepared or able to process such intense information. Typically, trauma dumping does not involve a mutual exchange or support but rather an overwhelming one-sided outpouring of personal distress.

It can be done by constantly talking about a traumatic experience or by deliberately reliving it through reenactment. Trauma dumping can have negative consequences for the individual doing the dumping and for anyone on the receiving end. 

“Trauma dumping is the unfiltered sharing of strong emotions or upsetting experiences without permission from the listener.”

– Talkspace therapist Dr. Olga Molina, D.S.W., LCSW 

When someone experiences any of the many types of trauma, they often feel overwhelmed and seek relief by sharing their story. Unfortunately, this can backfire. The listener may feel burdened by having to hear about the trauma, and they may even start to avoid the person continually bringing up traumatic events.

It’s important to remember that everyone deals with trauma differently. There’s no right or wrong way to process trauma.

Trauma Dumping vs. Venting

When discussing traumatic experiences, we need to understand the difference between dumping and venting. Both involve sharing difficult experiences with others, but they serve different purposes.

Dumping is when we unload personal trauma onto someone else without regard for their emotional state or well-being. We might do this because we’re overwhelmed by our experience and need relief, or we may think the other person can fix us.

Venting, on the other hand, is a way of releasing some of the pent-up emotions associated with trauma in a safe and controlled manner. When we vent to another person, we’re mindful of their emotional boundaries and only share as much as they can handle hearing. This allows us to process our difficult emotions in a healthy way while still maintaining control.

How to Know If You’re Trauma Dumping

Trauma dumping can be incredibly overwhelming and an emotionally draining experience — both for the person doing the trauma unloading and for the person receiving it. 

How do you know if you’re trauma dumping? Here are some trauma dumping examples to look out for:

You feel like you need to get everything off your chest immediately

Holding in negative feelings about a traumatic event can be extremely difficult. When this happens, you might feel desperate to unload all your emotions onto someone else as soon as possible.

This can lead to impulsively seeking out anyone who’ll listen, regardless of whether or not they’re equipped to deal with your emotional outpouring.

You start talking without taking a breath

Once you finally start talking about what happened, it can be hard to stop. The words may feel like they’re tumbling out as though there’s no tomorrow. This nonstop stream-of-consciousness style of communication can leave both parties feeling exhausted. It can be particularly taxing for the person on the receiving end who didn’t have the opportunity to mentally or emotionally prepare for what they were about to hear.

You become extremely attached to one person

In many cases, a trauma dumper will fixate on one person they view as their “savior.” They’ll cling desperately to this person and pour their heart out at every opportunity, even if it’s been made clear that this level of intimacy is unacceptable. This developed codependency could be due to abandonment trauma experienced at a young age.

Your behavior starts impacting others negatively

Though traumatic events can negatively impact life, make sure your reactions don’t unintentionally hurt those around you. Unfortunately, this isn’t always easy — particularly when you’re already struggling with intense emotions related to your trauma.

You’re not actually getting any relief from trauma dumping

If you’ve been trauma dumping for a while, and it doesn’t seem to provide the release you need, it could be a sign you should seek professional help. Dumping your emotions onto someone else though, — even if they’re sympathetic and willing to listen — isn’t always an adequate substitute for professional counseling or therapy.  

Effects of Trauma Dumping & Oversharing

Trauma dumping can lead to feeling re-traumatized or further traumatized. There are a few reasons why people might engage in trauma dumping. 

For some, it might be a way of seeking validation or attention. Others may feel that they need to unload the burden of their traumatic experience onto someone else. Still, others may not know how else to cope with their negative feelings surrounding the event.

Social media and trauma dumping

If you’re using social media to share your experiences with the world to gain validation or sympathy, you might be trauma dumping. We often think of social media as a way to stay connected with friends and family — but for some people, it can be anything but positive. 

“Trauma dumping is often seen in social media and can be a form of manipulating friends. Trauma dumping can also happen in person, via text message, or through phone calls.”

– Talkspace therapist Dr. Olga Molina, D.S.W., LCSW 

Research shows a link between social media and mental health conditions — especially if you’re prone to “trauma dumping.” Remember that there’s nothing wrong with seeking emotional support from others after experiencing something traumatizing. However, it can do more harm than good if you’re constantly reliving the details of your trauma on social media.

How to Deal with Trauma Dumping

How you deal with trauma dumping will depend on if you’re doing the trauma retelling or you’re the one listening to the trauma. 

On the receiving end 

It can be difficult enough to manage your own mental health, but what about when you’re on the receiving end of someone else’s trauma? 

Here are some tips on how to best help a loved one during this challenging time:

• Be there: This may seem obvious, but sometimes, just being present and available can make a difference. Tell them you’re there for them and that they can come to you with anything they need.
• Listen without judgment: It’s important that your loved one feels safe enough to open up fully without worrying they’ll be judged or misunderstood. Take the time to listen and try not to offer any quick solutions or advice unless you’re asked for it directly. Focus on validation by summarizing what was said so they know you’re hearing them.
• Set healthy boundaries: That being said, it’s important you look out for yourself and set healthy boundaries. If a certain topic is triggering for you, validate your loved one’s feelings, but let them know that you do not feel comfortable discussing further with them. Follow up by letting them know you would be happy to help connect them with a mental health professional who can help in a much greater capacity.
• Offer practical help: If your loved one is struggling with everyday tasks like cooking or cleaning, see if there’s anything you can do to help. You might offer to pick up around the house or take care of the shopping so they can focus emotionally on taking care of themself.
• Encourage self-care: Helping a traumatized loved one practice healthy coping mechanisms such as exercise, relaxation techniques, journaling for mental health, or talk therapy can be a crucial component in their recovery journey. It is equally as important you care for yourself, as well. You cannot fully help someone else if you, yourself, are in need of help, too.
• Seek professional help together: Talking things through with a trained therapist can provide invaluable insight and guidance that would otherwise be unavailable.
  

Being on the receiving end of someone else’s personal trauma can be difficult, but there are ways you can support your loved one. Being present and actively listening, without judgment, can make a huge difference.

As the trauma dumper

When it comes to trauma dumping, we generally think more about the person on the receiving end — but what about the person doing the dumping?

If you find yourself in a relationship where you trauma dump on others (or you feel tempted to do so), make an effort to stop, for your sake and theirs.

• Take some time for self-reflection
• Try identifying why you’re turning to this type of behavior to cope 
• Consider trauma therapy so you can make the necessary changes to prevent the pattern from continuing 

Learn How to Effectively Deal with Trauma with Talkspace

If you’re struggling with trauma, seeking help from a mental health professional is essential, especially if you’re dumping your trauma onto others. Trauma dumping can damage existing relationships and make it difficult to form new, healthy ones.

When not dealt with, trauma can lead to anxiety, depression, and other physical and mental health conditions. If you need someone to talk to, consider finding a therapist online or in-person who can help you deal with your trauma more positively and effectively.

If you’re looking for help, consider seeking out online therapy. Talkspace is an online therapy platform that’s a great option if you don’t have the time or ability to see a therapist in person. Online therapy can provide the guidance you need to work through your trauma in a safe and confidential setting from the comfort of your home. 

Reach out to Talkspace today to learn more about how to deal with trauma.